7 signs you could be coming on too strong

Update: A previous version of this article contained quotes from an expert whose credentials are now in question. We have reached out to him for confirmation of those credentials and have not heard back. You can read Gizmodo's investigation here, and his response here. INSIDER has updated this article as of 3/1/19.

Let’s face it — sometimes, we can all get a little too aggressive, especially when it comes to dating. What some of us may consider playful flirting, others may see as coming on a little strong. We live and learn from these moments, but sometimes it's the hard way.

If your Tinder dates end up abruptly sizzling out with a bunch of unanswered texts, then you may be a little too aggressive with your dating style. INSIDER asked experts to weigh in on some signs that you may want to back off a bit at first.

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You text first — all the time.

Texting first every once in a while isn’t a bad thing at all. With that being said, if you’re texting first every time and you’re getting curt responses, it’s a pretty clear sign that your fling is starting to burn out, according to certified counselor and co-founder of Double Trust Dating, Jonathan Bennett.

"If you do most of the talking or texting with another person, it’s a sign you’re coming on too strong," he said. "For example, you write long blocks of text, but the other person gives a one or two word reply. In most cases, the other person isn’t that interested and is trying to give you a hint."

There's a chance they haven’t tried to reach out to you because they’re ready to move on, and texting them first all of the time just seems too eager. So, if they really want to talk to you, let them make the first move for once.

You make a habit of double, triple, or quadruple texting.

Of course, you can text someone whenever you want, but texting "lol" or a row of question marks two hours after your last text isn’t probably isn't going to make them respond any faster. They’re probably busy, or maybe they just don’t want to talk. It's best to let them respond to you if they want to instead of sending multiple follow-ups.

"If someone has a life and is busy at work, it’s fun to hear from them a few times a day when you first start dating, but creating a digital novel is too much, too soon," said award-winning dating coach and CEO of Cyber-Dating Expert, Julie Spira.

You often linger or tag along without being invited.

After the date is over, did they invite you over to their apartment, or did you invite yourself in? Lingering is not only annoying, but it can be jarring and an invasion of their personal space.

"If you're forgetting that this new person your dating has their own life, you might be coming off way too strong," said TooTimid’s sex and relationship expert, Bethany Ricciardi. "You don't want to ask them to hang out every night, or tag along during errands and events they have going on. If they want you there they'll invite you and sometimes people just need their alone time."

Unless your potential suitor asks you to come over, don’t go to their apartment to throw rocks at their window while you blare Peter Gabriel on a boombox — your love interest (and their neighbors) will not appreciate it.