Bridesmaid raging after bridezilla mate UNINVITES her son from her destination wedding – after she’s already booked the tickets
IT’S a bit awkward when you invite someone to your wedding… and then proceed to uninvite them a few months later.
It’s even more awkward when the wedding is abroad and they’ve already paid for flights and accommodation.
But, this is what happened to one bridesmaid when her bride and friend of 25 years decided she wanted a totally child-free wedding at the last minute.
Taking to Mumsnet to voice her upset, the mum explained: “In January my best friend invited us to her wedding, which is taking place in July in another country.
“She asked me to be a bridesmaid. The wedding invite stated ‘no children’ and when I queried this she said they were having an adults only wedding – except obviously their own children would be there [aged one and three].
“She told me that as I am a bridesmaid, my son [aged two] could come and she also knows I have no childcare options (dad is too old and sick and no parents on husband’s side).
“All sounds good and I say I would love to be a bridesmaid.
“My husband and I booked the time off work, the accommodation and the transport. Everything is now paid for.
“Today she has told me that my son can no longer come with us as they have decided it really is adults only and they don’t want the stress of children.
“She suggested I come alone and leave my husband at home with our son.
“I understand that it is her wedding and therefore her rules. After all, they have paid for it.
“But to say yes and then change your mind? When everything is already booked?
“What would you do? Am I being unreasonable?”
Fellow Mumsnet users were appalled at the bride, with several asking if she planned on reimbursing her for already incurred expenses.
“Is she going to reimburse what you’re out of pocket?” One asked.
“Shocking for her to change when she knows you’ve booked.”
Others called the bride an “entitled brat” while one advised telling her to “stuff the wedding”
“What an awful friend,” said one user.
“And telling you after you’ve booked! She’s no friend.
“She’s just an entitled brat – and she knows you situation too. Awful behaviour.”
“I’d tell her to stuff the wedding and use it as a holiday… (or ask her to reimburse your costs),” suggested another.
Others were divided, with one person defending the bride.
“You say best friend, and if that’s really true then I would say do whatever she asks.
“Good idea from previous posters about you all going to the hotel/resort but you only go to the wedding.”
Another suggested the bridesmaid reiterate that she had already booked the trip in case the bride hadn’t realised.
“Just say, ‘oh goodness, we have already booked flights and accommodation for all of us in the wedding hotel.
“‘We can ask the hotel if they have evening babysitters, but we can’t leave our son with a stranger all day.’
“See what she says, if she is an idiot about it, then pull out of the wedding and say that, as you are staying in the same place you will no doubt bump into each other, but sadly you can’t attend under these circumstances.
“It will be her feeling awkward on the big day, not you.”
One suggested sending the following message, which many other users agreed was a good idea.
“I am sorry that you are finding things stressful however you cannot honestly think it is OK that we have booked and paid for us to come as a family, as YOU agreed we could, and then uninvite guests and allow them to be out of pocket.
“Aside to the financial loss, you did agree my son could come based upon my childcare circumstances which have not changed.
“I will cancel my reservations and hope for a refund. I wish you the best of times on your wedding.”
The mum later explained she has so far spent £300 on accommodation and £250 on travel.
What would you do?
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