The Bachelorette: Our preseason picks to win Hannah B.'s heart
Buckle up, Bachelor nation. A new season of The Bachelorette will begin Monday night (8:00 p.m. ET, ABC), and a total of 30 men will make their first impressions on Hannah Brown in the premiere episode.
Before Hannah B. awards the first impression rose and makes her first cut of the series on night one, FTW’s staff of Bachelor diehards and casual viewers submitted their picks to earn the final rose based on each contestant’s headshot and bio. You can familiarize yourself with each cast member here.
Marissa Kasner: I’m just going to go ahead and state for the record that I am NOT great at picking a winner before night one. The pilots – Chasen & Peter – seem particularly charming (via photo), and there’s something about Connor S. I think Hannah could be drawn to… but I’m seeing a lot of stubble in the previews, so assuming Hannah’s into a five o’clock shadow, I’m giving Peter my rose to go all the way.
No chance with the Beast: Sorry Connor J., choosing you because you were seemingly absent from the season preview… if you make a splash perhaps we’ll see you in Paradise a la Grocery Store Joe!?
Nick Schwartz: I am torn between Cam, who scored the unofficial first impression rose during the finale of The Bachelor, and Garrett, who shares an Alabama connection with Hannah B. Garrett does not appear to be an amateur freestyle rapper, so we’ll give him the edge – but I do expect Cam to make a deep run.
No chance with the Beast: John Paul Jones. From what we can gather about John Paul Jones – who rarely uses words that are less than three syllables long,” according to his bio – seems primed to be the next Jordan – a made-for-reality-TV personality who will be at the center of several episodes, yet fail to make any real progress with The Bachelorette. He’s a lock for Paradise.
Charles Curtis: I’m picking Chasen to win. There’s only one reason why: His favorite pastime is watching the Bachelor, so he knows all the tricks to get both camera time and to the heart of the Bachelorette
No chance with the Beast: Grant will not win because he’s The Dude and I just don’t see Hannah going for a guy like The Dude
Chris Korman: I’m going with Ryan, because … honestly because he grew up not far from where I did and I have no clue how this show works and I feel like the approach of just making up your profession — “Roller Boy” — has as much chance as anything of working here so, yeah, pretty confident on this one. Plus he was high school valedictorian and this whole show is largely about displaying intellect and matching wits, right?
No chance with the Beast: Matt Donald, clearly. First off there’s a Matt and a Matthew and even a Matteo and some of them just need to get eliminated. Second, Matt Donald claims to already be in love with Hannah B., per his bio. Don’t fall in love with someone you haven’t met, Matt Donald, that’s not actually how any of this works and it isn’t cute or funny, it actually marks you as almost certainly in need of serious mental health treatment.