So you want to watch Tottenham play in the Champions League final in Madrid?

Good luck! Let’s play a fun thought-experiment game. You, genius, American (probably), Tottenham Hotspur fan, are so swept up in Spurs’ magical run to the Champions League final that you decide that you want to be at the Wanda Metropolitano in Madrid for Spurs’ first taste of a European final since the 1960s. You know it’ll be pricey — it’s one of the most watched and popular sporting events in the world — but damn the torpedoes, how hard could it possibly be?

Unfortunately, the answer is: without question extremely difficult, and extortionately expensive. Time to break it down.

Tickets

One of the most common questions I’ve gotten on Twitter from various people through DMs is if there’s any possibility at this stage of getting tickets...