My boyfriend wants me to go to a swingers’ club for sex because he can’t get an erection
DEAR DEIDRE: MY boyfriend says he’ll take me to a swingers’ club for sex if he can’t sort out his erection problems.
We met on a dating site and had a strong connection. I’m 28 and he is 31.
He has had erection problems for a while. But he wants a future with me and decided to see a specialist.
If the specialist can’t sort it, he suggested I go to a swingers’ club. I couldn’t believe he’d share me.
Should I put the marriage plans on hold?
Popular Dear Deidre problems
DEIDRE SAYS: He may mean well. Your boyfriend feels a failure as a man but you are right to be wary.
Swinging often wrecks relationships. Tell him you love him, not his erection.
You two can share sexual pleasure and satisfaction without intercourse. But he must see a doctor. The issue could signal an underlying medical problem that needs treating.
If he gets the all-clear, it is likely to be him feeling the pressure to perform – but tell him to avoid porn, which can have a deadening effect.
My e-leaflet Your Man Losing His Erection? explains how you can help build up his sexual confidence.
READ NEXT IN TODAY’S DEAR DEIDRE I’m dying to tell the world that I’m a woman trapped in a man’s body but my wife says she’ll leave if I do
READ DEIDRE’S PHOTO CASEBOOK Marie begins to suspect there’s someone else so Mick has to choose
Get in touch with Deidre today
Got a problem? Send an email to problems@deardeidre.org. Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.
You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.
Follow me on Twitter @deardeidre.
