My husband’s colleague flirted outrageously with him – while I watched
DEAR DEIDRE: MY husband’s work pal flirted outrageously with him at the Christmas party – right in front of me.
It was so embarrassing. I could have slapped both of them but I smiled through gritted teeth.
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When my husband’s mum died suddenly last year, this colleague was so supportive towards him. She seemed like a nice person but I’d never met her.
I knew my husband was texting her but I thought they were mates — I have male friends, after all.
But seeing her in action, the situation was obviously very different.
I’m 32 and he’s 38. We’ve been married for seven years.
This colleague is pretty and in her late twenties. She was wearing a figure-hugging, red backless dress. She oozed sex appeal.
She said hello to me then flung her arms around my husband and gave him a kiss on the cheek.
She hardly left his side, touching him and pulling him on to the dance floor.
A couple of times she brushed her breasts past his nose getting out of her chair.
She must think I’m blind.
After one dance, there were no chairs so she plonked herself on his lap while I sat there feeling uncomfortable.
Colleagues looked embarrassed until the managing director stepped in and kindly took her out of the situation.
We had a huge row at home. He’d done nothing to push her away yet he constantly rejects me.
Our sex life is non-existent. When I ask for sex, he tells me he’s too tired.
My husband is good-looking and says casual sex as a teenager has left him “worn out”.
Get in touch with Deidre
Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.
Send an email to deardeidre@the-sun.co.uk
You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.
He blames me for him being in pain since his vasectomy. We have two daughters, so I made him get the snip.
This woman has said to him I was giving her daggers — I’m sure she wants to split us up.
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DEIDRE SAYS: Bereaved people often confide in somebody outside of their home situation because it’s an escape from reality – and affairs can happen.
But in your husband’s case, it sounds like the flirting was one-sided. Maybe he didn’t know how to handle her and didn’t want to cause a scene.
Find time to explain you are feeling threatened and see if he can reassure you.
Explain he must insist to her he is off-limits. My pack on Standing Up For Yourself will teach him assertiveness.
Urge him to see his GP for a referral about his vasectomy pain.
In the meantime, my support pack Couples Massage might help you find some of the intimacy you have lost.