Essential ingredient to a happy marriage is earth-shattering, says VANESSA FELTZ

I can't manage to move on. I'm still bogged down in the results of that survey conducted by a hotel chain revealing the essential ingredients of a happy marriage. It stipulated the requisite number of rows, long walks, cuddles, shared telly shows and cheerful chats essential for marital bliss. "Okay", I hear you say, "nothing to bother us there." You're right.