3 difficult money conversations 'Queer Eye' host Tan France had with his husband before getting married

• Before getting married, 'Queer Eye' TV host Tan France and his husband had deep conversations about money.
• They were intentional about not taking any financial problems into their future marriage.
• The couple also talked about the money values they wanted to pass down to their future children.
• Read more stories from Personal Finance Insider.

We may know Tan France as the stylist from Netflix's "Queer Eye," but at home with his husband, Rob France, and their eight-month old son, Ismail, in Salt Lake City, he's just a regular loving dad and family man.

In his memoir "Naturally Tan," the fashion icon tells readers about their modest wedding. "We were broke as a joke," he writes. They put on their wedding suits, then hopped on the train to Islington Town Hall in London with three close friends who served as witnesses. "It was exactly what we wanted it to be," Tan writes. "It wasn't about a wedding, it wasn't about a party. It was about us."

Before getting married in 2007, the couple was in a long-distance relationship, with Rob living in the States and Tan living in England while running a wholesale fashion business.

Being in a long-distance relationship allowed the couple to connect emotionally, and have in-depth conversations about their future. Here are three money conversations Tan and Rob France had before getting married.

1. They discussed which money values they want to pass down to their kids

Rob comes from a Mormon family who owned a ranch, while Tan came from a conservative working-class South Asian immigrant household. Both Rob and Tan are practical spenders who try to avoid using credit cards, and they want to pass down the same values to their kids.

Tan told Insider that he and Rob have no plans of spoiling his children. "I'm gonna tell my kids, 'If you want that car, you better save up, because daddy ain't paying for it,'" he said.

2. They set a precedent for making big purchases together

"From an early stage in our relationship, we always talked about any big purchases," Tan said. "We would discuss what it was going to be, and when we would buy it."  

Before they ever knew Tan would start earning a big entertainer's paycheck, the couple made a timeline that included when they'd move in together, when they'd start trying to have children, and what it would take for them to earn and save enough money to meet those goals.

3. They talked about each other's debts

"Rob had student loans, and I owed my mom $600, no big deal," Tan said. "We talked about how we were going to pay that off as quickly as possible."

Tan also said that, in the early days as a business owner, Rob loaned him a few thousand dollars to help get his business off the ground. "It was important for me that he understood I would pay him back, but I didn't feel any pressure because he's my partner," he said.

Tan continued, "We didn't want to go into our marriage with financial concerns. Money is very important in our relationship. It's a point of respect for both of us."