I've negotiated everything from speaking fees to the cost of a blender, and I swear by 5 rules to get great deals

• My mom taught me to always negotiate the price of a purchase, and I swear by that rule.
• I start by doing my research, and I never ask yes or no questions.
• I always come prepared with past pricing and deal info, and I'm always willing to walk away.

One of the key financial habits I learned from my mom growing up is something I still follow today: Never buy anything at full price. Instead, she showed me how to search for coupons, how to ask for discounts in the store, and which months had which items on sale (that's why we often bought winter coats in the summer and barbecues in the winter).

As I got older, I mastered the mindset of always looking for an offered discount, and if that wasn't available, to start negotiating. While I'm a shy person who doesn't like to ask for things, I find the art of negotiating with stores, vendors, or service providers doesn't have to be anxiety-inducing or scary, as long as you follow these five tips. 

Do your research 

Before I reach out to a business to negotiate a price, it's important that I spend quality time doing my research. I make a robust list of the following items:

• Their pricing: I like to study what's included in the price, did they recently raise their price, and more. I use websites like Scanbuy or Invisible Hand to track price changes.
• Their competitor's pricing: It's important to see what else is out there and offered by their competitors (their pricing model, what extra value they offer, and more). Even if you don't plan to use a competitor, it allows you to bring up other available offers out there that are as good in value but cost less. 
• Recent promotions or sales: This information comes in handy to negotiate a price if you missed a big sale that happened a few days or weeks ago. If that's the case, I bring that up in the negotiation. 
• Offered coupons: I take a look at offered discounts they provide that might not be available to me (new customer offers, bulk discounts, and more). This allows me to see how flexible they are with their pricing. 

Recently, I wanted to buy a blender from a specific brand. Through my research, I noticed that they had run a 40% off sale a few weeks ago but I had missed that offer. I reached out to their customer service team, shared that I'd like to receive that 40% offer instead of their current 15% promotion. They decided to honor that expired promotion and I was able to grab the blender at 40% off.

Come prepared 

Once I have a general understanding of how I want to approach the negotiation, I write out a script. I include what my initial position is going to be (for example, I'd like a 15% discount) and what my threshold is for walking away (they only offer a 5% discount). 

Writing this down helps me practice how I'm going to approach the negotiation and keeps me organized during the conversation.

When I went to hire a dog sitter, instead of just buying individual services with her, I wrote a script to negotiate buying a bulk package for 15% off. I wrote out what I wanted to say and she accepted the offer to charge me 15% off if I paid upfront for a 10 pack of her services. 

Use the anchoring technique 

A popular technique in negotiations is something called anchoring, which means establishing a reference point for the conversation. In negotiations, I will sometimes be the one who throws out a number that's more aggressive than what I'd settle for.

For example, if a product is $500, I'll ask for it to cost $200, knowing I'd say yes if it's $300. Starting the conversation with that low-ball offer helps make the number $300 seem more doable as the negotiation goes forward. 

When working with a new client, I had to negotiate the pricing of a service they wanted from me. I decided to start off by sharing my prices that were 10% higher than what I normally charge. They countered and asked if I could discount the prices by 15%. I offered a discount of 10% (which brought my pricing back to what I normally charge) and they accepted. While this seems like a game, it can sometimes help a person wrap their head around paying a high price for a service they've never bought before. 

Avoid yes or no questions

When I'm negotiating the price of something, I like to get the other person talking as much as possible. That way, they can not only think out loud about their position, but it can help me plan my next move. To help make this happen, I refrain from asking yes or no questions.

Rather than asking: "Can you give me a discount?"

I'll ask: "Tell me more about what we can do to lower this price."

That way, they can't just throw out the word "no" and end their side of the negotiation. Before you enter a negotiation, write these types of open-ended questions down so you can pull from them when the conversation is getting stale or it's not heading in the direction that you want. 

When I recently went with a family member to get their car serviced, the technician found a few problems with the car and the bill was going to be more than what the person could afford. Rather than asking for a discount or a deal, I simply asked how we can lower the price. I asked that three times and managed to get the technician to share how we could shave $300 off the bill. 

Be willing to walk away 

Being a good negotiator doesn't always mean that you will win and get what you asked for. But it does mean that you know when to walk away. 

Since you've done your research, you can decide what the final price would be that you'd accept. 

If you're not getting that price, and you've tried all the other tactics, you should have the confidence to walk away and perhaps pursue another business or vendor who will meet your price ask. 

For example:

"What can we do to lower this price?"

"Well, we can offer you a 10% discount. Does that work?"

"Thank you for that offer. I had 20% in mind. What can we do to get closer to this price?"

"I've checked with our corporate office. We can only do 10%. Any more won't be OK'd."

"What if you tried to ask one more time?"

"I will. OK, they echoed that sentiment of 10%."

"Thank you for your time. I won't be purchasing this item from you today."

When I was offered a speaking gig that was lower than my set rate, I used this technique. After going back and forth three times, the person shared they could not raise the rate even by a dollar. The offered price was not worth my time and I'd end up losing money on travel expenses. I decided that it was time to walk away and that's exactly what I did.