Everything Donald Trump touches dies

After being scraped out of the White House and deposited back at Mar-a-Lago, it didn't take long for Donald J. Trump to begin holding for-profit events that looked and sounded a lot like campaign rallies but have, in fact, been nothing but personal cash grabs. Donald likes yelling his grievances at a live audience; if weird and sedition-friendly Americans want to pay Donald to complain at them inside sweaty arenas with other like-minded masochists, Donald's going to take the money and yell the things.

We're all accustomed to this game by now, so if you assumed that Donald Trump getting paid was going to turn out to be connected to nearly everyone else involved in the effort getting screwed, you get no prize. Sure enough, the "American Freedom Tour" has been failing to pay its bills, canceling events, and leaving speakers not named Donald Trump wondering if they're ever going to get their money.