William ‘doesn’t trust’ Harry – who is finally realising what he’s lost by exiting the family, claims royal expert

Standing side by side, Princes William and Harry marched together as they paid tribute to their grandmother in her funeral procession.

United in grief, it was almost 25 years to the day that they’d walked behind a different coffin – that of their mother, Princess Diana.

Yet this is an image that was unthinkable just a year ago. 

Then, at the funeral of Prince Philip in April 2021, their cousin Peter Phillips separated the warring brothers in the procession and, aside from a brief conversation as they left St George’s Chapel, Windsor, not even peacemaker Kate could bring them together.

But the death of Queen Elizabeth II just over three weeks ago, at the age of 96, and the monumental events since, have changed royal life forever. 

In his first speech as King, Charles spoke warmly of his younger son and daughter-in-law.

And William offered them an early olive branch in the form of a Windsor walkabout with himself and Kate – it was the Fab Four’s first reunion since that chilly last meeting at the Commonwealth Service at Westminster Abbey in March 2020, when neither party could bear to look at each other.

So what does this mean for Harry and Meghan?

Could the Duke and Duchess of Sussex, having stepped back as working royals and made a new life for themselves in California, return to the royal frontline? Is a reconciliation on the cards at last? 

The last two years have seen a succession of brickbats hurled by Harry and Meghan into the heart of Buckingham Palace.

In turn, William and Charles have been left hurt, angry and bewildered at the constant revelations of deeply personal family business.

“After the Queen died, both brothers understood that they had to put personal feelings aside for the sake of their grandmother,” says one royal insider who knows Harry and William.

“Both men have tried but, on William’s side, he just does not trust his brother or sister-in-law. 

“How can he have frank conversations with Harry when he is worried one or the other will misinterpret what’s said, take offence and/or talk about it publicly?

“This inevitably means that Harry was shut out from much of the business of state with William and Charles in the days after the Queen’s death. Their view is that Harry chose this path and so cannot be involved.

“From Harry’s point of view, he still wants an admission from both the family and the ‘men in grey suits’, as he calls them, that he and his wife were wronged.

“He doesn’t trust the institution and has repeatedly said he felt stifled and, towards the end, persecuted.

“He has really struggled these past few weeks, and has felt he’s done his duty to support his father.

“Yet the debacle over uniforms and reception invitations has really not helped and has just reinforced his sense of loss and inferiority. He felt as if he was being punished by the Firm.”

Indeed, the removal of the ER (Elizabeth Regina) insignia from the epaulettes of Harry’s Blues and Royals uniform caused frantic phone calls from Frogmore Cottage – where Harry and Meghan were staying – to Buckingham Palace the evening before the grandchildren’s vigil around Her Late Majesty’s coffin in Westminster Hall.

Harry, 38, was said to be so upset and insulted that at one point he considered wearing a morning suit instead.

The reason for the removal was that when Harry stepped back from being a working royal in March 2021, he also gave up his position as an aide-de-camp to the Queen – signified by the ER insignia.

On the horizon is the small matter of Harry’s memoir, written with ghost writer JR Moehringer, which was due out this autumn but has reportedly been delayed until early next year out of respect for the Queen.

Emily Andrews

The friend continues: “On the one hand, I can see why Harry was so upset. It is very significant in his mind, but on the other it was his choice to leave as a working royal.

“Perhaps he’s now finally realising what he has lost. But this episode will only serve to confirm in his own mind his decision, as he sees the palace as being unutterably petty to humiliate him in such a way.”

Yet William, 40, went out of his way during the Queen’s funeral to appease his brother and sister-in-law to make them feel part of the family.

After Buckingham Palace officials had removed the ER from Harry’s uniform, William left off his own ornamental gold braid aiguillettes that he is entitled to wear as an aide-de-camp, at the grandchildren’s vigil.

During the funeral, Meghan, 41, was invited to join the royal procession following the Queen’s coffin into Westminster Abbey, and William sat Princess Charlotte next to her uncle Harry at the more personal committal service at St George’s Chapel, appearing to usher Meghan and Harry to go first and choose their seats as they entered. 

But will it be enough to lure the Sussexes home?

A key factor in understanding the appeal of America – as opposed to the rigid hierarchy and “British stiff upper lip” of the royal family – lies in how they are feted there, as opposed to being behind even Prince George and Princess Charlotte here. 

Last month at a charitable symposium in the US desert, the great and the good gathered to burnish their credentials.

Present were billionaires Elon Musk, CEO of Tesla, Nike co-founder and chairman Phil Knight and Amazon tycoon Jeff Bezos.

But who were the guests of honour at this conclave of the super-rich, the couple who everyone wanted to speak to and sit next to? Harry and Meghan.

In the liberal west coast states, royalty is the very peak of celebrity – and the Sussexes know they enjoy a platform, and money-making potential that they would never have in the UK. 

It is a fallacy that Meghan was the one who “stole” Harry from these shores.

From Harry’s point of view, he still wants an admission from both the family and the ‘men in grey suits’, as he calls them, that he and his wife were wronged.

Royal insider

The truth is that Harry – funny, engaging and so open about his emotions – always wanted out. Meghan just held out the ripcord for him.

So, from their point of view, there is little appetite to return to the strictures and duty of royal life.

Harry has pursued several ventures in the US since stepping down in March 2020, including as the chief impact officer at the California mental health start-up BetterUp.

He has also served as a commissioner at the Aspen Institute, working on the issue of disinformation in America.

Meanwhile, Meghan’s new Spotify series Archetypes launched in August to mixed reviews.

It showcases interviews with news-making women – the first episode featured tennis legend and close friend of Meghan, Serena Williams.

The podcast was paused due to the Queen’s death, but it briefly dethroned The Joe Rogan Experience as the most popular show on Spotify and, at time of going to press, was third in the charts in the US and fourth in the UK.

Meghan has told friends that she much prefers building a family life in Montecito, California, with Archie, three, and Lilibet, 16 months, rather than in the UK, and it is unlikely she would ever return to live here.

The children have American passports and Meghan never took British citizenship, so it is likely the King’s grandchildren will be raised as American citizens rather than British royalty.

Technically, as the grandchildren of a monarch through the male line, Archie is now a prince and Lilibet a princess.

It will be interesting to see whether King Charles issues new Letters Patent to remove their titles and confirm they have no HRH, now that their parents are no longer working royals.

This was something Harry and Meghan complained about bitterly, with some reports even suggesting they had raised this with the King in the period between the Queen’s death and her funeral.

Charles and William remain aligned. Much as they can see the benefit Harry and Meghan would have brought as working royals, they have been deeply hurt by the Sussexes ‘speaking their truth’.

Emily Andrews

There’s no denying the division between Harry and his family caused the Queen much heartache in her latter years.

Harry had always been one of her favourites and she only met her new great-granddaughter Lilibet, named after the Queen’s family nickname, for the first time during her Platinum Jubilee in June.

Harry and Meghan’s promise to honour the Queen and the institution that she led seemed to fall by the wayside.

Meanwhile, Charles and William remain aligned. Much as they can see the benefit Harry and Meghan would have brought as working royals, they have been deeply hurt by the Sussexes “speaking their truth”.

In their bombshell interview with Oprah Winfrey last year, they accused an unnamed royal of racism towards their then-unborn son Archie, and claimed that Meghan was neglected as a child and that Charles cut Harry off.

Finally, it was alleged that in the high drama over planning Harry and Meghan’s wedding, Kate made Meghan cry – and not the other way round, as some suggested.

The barbs didn’t stop there. Harry criticised the way his father had raised him, saying that he suffered “genetic pain and suffering” due to the unfeeling way the Queen and Prince Philip had brought up their children.

Harry also sued the Home Office – at great expense to the British taxpayer – for removing his family’s security while not with the royal family.

He then continued to talk about deeply personal family relationships. Meanwhile, in August, Meghan spoke to American online magazine The Cut about how cruelly she felt she had been treated while in the UK and seemed to suggest Harry’s relationship with Charles was “lost”.

Certainly from the outset, King Charles, and indeed William, wanted a public show of family unity so as not to detract from the mourning of the Queen and celebrating her record-breaking 70-year reign. But it is an uneasy truce.

On Harry’s 38th birthday on September 15, William was on the school run to pick up George, nine, Charlotte, seven, and Louis, four, from their new school Lambrook, when he drove past Harry and Meghan.

Both brothers realised who was in the other car, stopped, reversed and had a quick chat through the wound-down windows.

But there were no cosy cups of tea or late-night suppers for the former Fab Four, despite them living so close on the Windsor estate, since the newly named Wales family moved to Adelaide Cottage a month ago.

On the horizon is the small matter of Harry’s memoir, written with ghost writer JR Moehringer, which was due out this autumn but has reportedly been delayed until early next year out of respect for the Queen.

The manuscript is finished, Harry having done the bulk of the interviews last year at the height of his anger and grief.

The royal family will not see the book until it is published, with rumours that new Queen Consort Camilla is heavily criticised in it.

Meghan has already indicated she has more to say, telling The Cut: “It takes a lot of effort to forgive. I’ve really made an active effort, especially knowing that I can say anything. I have a lot to say until I don’t.”

The couple are also working on an “at-home” docu-series for Netflix, with reports in America suggesting its release could be imminent and coincide with the next series of The Crown, which is due to air in November.

Meghan has said it will tell their “love story”. The emotional content will, no doubt, contrast with that stereotypical British sense of reserve.

It seems once the royal mourning period is over, the Firm will be forced to adopt the brace position once more.