I’m fed up of seeing photos of mums and their ‘snap back’ post-baby bodies – it’s isolating to new mums and unhealthy
AN exclusive Fab Daily poll has found 43 per cent of new mums struggle after they see pictures of others looking in great shape.
Dr Megan Gow, from the University of Sydney, added that some may be having problems with “feelings of inadequacy” after giving birth, and she fears the online photos could make things worse.
But can images of women flaunting their trim, post-pregnancy bodies really shatter the self-confidence of other women?
SARAH Harker made fitness a priority during and after her pregnancy.
The 33-year-old from Newcastle runs Instagram fitness and nutrition company @Sarahlouskitchen and lives with boyfriend Todd, 31, a personal trainer, and five-month-old daughter Hallie Florence.
She says: “Seeing someone document their journey to getting fit again is inspiring, not body confidence-shredding.
Fitness is important to me, for the huge benefits to my mental as well as physical health.
Before I got pregnant I was in the best shape of my life and I felt amazing.
So, setting a goal to feel that good again was a positive thing.
But when I posted on my socials that it felt good to be back into my jeans again, I faced a backlash.
One person told me sharing a picture of my jeans zipping back up was “damaging for people’s self-image and mental health”.
But I had posted that picture because, nine months after growing a human and watching my body change and expand, I felt really good about myself.
When I was 20 weeks pregnant, you could not physically tell that I was expecting.
One troll commented that they hoped our baby would be born disabled, as I shouldn’t be working out.
They claimed I was selfish and arrogant to do so.
But training gave me the strength to recover quickly from a traumatic C-section delivery and helped me get back to regular life.
That feeling of putting on a pair of jeans again and doing the button up was amazing.
At no point did I think I’d get backlash for it.
Fitness is important to me, for the huge benefits to my mental as well as physical health.
Sarah Harker
One person’s insecurity is no reason to tear another down.
The only person who is putting pressure on me is me — not Instagram influencers who have snapped back.
You are under no obligation to follow their, or my, lead.
But unfortunately it is self-conscious people who have no intention of wanting to change, or exercise to boost their self-worth and mental outlook, who are the ones that want to tear others down.
Unfollows don’t offend me, but messages trying to bring me down or make me question my lifestyle choices do.
People are so uninformed about what our bodies are capable of and how beneficial exercise can be during and after pregnancy.
To me, someone documenting their journey back to a feeling of self-confidence and a healthy approach to getting fit again is inspiring, empowering and motivating.”
So uninformed
GARDENER Kendall Platt, 36, who runs Adventures With Flowers, is mum to four-year-old Arwen and seven-month-old Elora.
She was a size 12 before having her children and is now a 14.
She believes women who share “unrealistic” photos of their bodies after snapping back into shape post-birth are putting other new mums under unbearable pressure to lose weight.
Kendall, who lives with husband Dave, 38, in Reading, says:
“As a new mum you are tired, depleted and lonely.
While doing night feeds, I spent a lot of time on social media as a way of feeling connected to women who were in the same boat.
But seeing pictures of mums who had “pinged back” into shape within just weeks of childbirth actually made me feel more isolated.
I have a rule that I unfollow someone the minute I start to compare myself with them, or if their content makes me feel bad about myself.
So if I saw someone I followed posting this sort of thing, I’d roll my eyes, hit the unfollow button and focus on what’s more important — just enjoying my new baby and trying to navigate my new normal.
I have a rule that I unfollow someone the minute I start to compare myself with them, or if their content makes me feel bad about myself.
Kendall Platt
Personally, I feel proud if I get through the day with everyone fed, watered and happy.
I haven’t got the time to be worrying about snapping back into shape and I question how healthy it is for new mums to be losing weight so dramatically after giving birth.
It certainly isn’t good for our mental health to be made to feel bad about yet another thing that we’re not doing “perfectly”.
We are growing the next generation and hopefully instilling in them a sense of what is important.
Newsflash: That isn’t their body size — no matter what society tells us.
I find the constant narrative around size, weight and dieting damaging.
It’s especially hard for new mums who get very little sleep, may be breastfeeding and have very little time to exercise.
Their bodies have just been through a monumental experience and the last thing they should be doing is depriving themselves of food.
Pre-baby jeans
My body has changed since having kids. I don’t have the tiny waist I did before. But I don’t care.
My priority isn’t fitting into my pre-baby jeans. Becoming a mother has made me respect my body more than ever.
Society’s obsession with being skinny — and your self-worth being linked to your size — is so unhealthy.
I tell my daughters I swim because it’s good for my mind, and they’re intrigued by that.
I want them to know that exercise has lots of health benefits.
It’s not just about losing weight and getting back into your skinny jeans.”
GIVE THE BASICS A BOOST
PARENTING expert Poppy O’Neill, whose new book Mother Power is out next month, shares her tips on getting body confident after childbirth . . .
FEELING BALMY: As a new mum, your wellbeing routine can bite the dust, leaving you feeling drab.
Pop a couple of basics, such as lip balm or scent, on the hallway table or in a kitchen drawer.
If you catch sight of yourself without your trademark make-up on and it brings you down, quickly swipe some on.
You’ll experience an instant, feelgood factor.
CHILDCARE SHARE: Start a babysitting circle. Precious moments alone as a couple, or some simple me-time, will make you feel like a new woman post-birth.
Hit up a couple of your new parent friends and start a system where you babysit each other’s kids on a monthly rotation.
It’s free and you all get some alone time.
DON’T RUSH THE BRUSH: Life with a new baby can leave zero time for self-care.
Pinpoint one simple act that makes you feel like yourself – it could be as simple as brushing your teeth really well, or slathering on some body lotion.
Make this simple act a priority for when you have a moment between changing nappies and feeds.
CREATE A THANKS BANK: Research shows that focusing on what we’re grateful for – rather than what we’re unhappy about – increases wellbeing.
Avoid dwelling on negatives and shift attention to what you feel good about.
Write what you’re thankful for in a notebook and read it back when your confidence dips.
BLOCK THE BADDIES: Do some of the social media accounts you follow make you feel anxious or insecure?
Maybe the person seems to have the perfect body or the well-behaved kids.
If so, ditch them.
When our confidence is vulnerable, these accounts can make us feel worse.
Once you’ve unfollowed them, you’ll be surprised by how little you miss them.