Rich Hill races Miguel Cabrera in MLB’s senior Olympics

RUN, YOU BEAUTIFUL OLD MEN, RUN!

Two of baseball’s elder statesmen found themselves in a footrace on Thursday afternoon and it was the slowest, most compelling sprint of all time.

It was a case of age before beauty as Rich Hill (43) edged out Miguel Cabrera (40). Sure, technically the scorecard will show that Cabrera was out at first, but both men were truly winners. After the play was done the pair smiled at each other, catching their breath and realizing they aren’t spring chickens anymore, or even fall chickens — are winter chickens a thing? What’s a winter chicken?

In any event, the stat we’re all dying for is the top speed these icons reached. These two faced each other 18 YEARS AGO back on June 15, 2005. To give you an idea of what was happening when Hill and Cabrera faced off then:

• Batman Begins was released
• We Belong Together by Mariah Carey was the No. 1 song on the Billboard charts, while Gwen Steffani’s Hollaback Girl was No. 2
• Rafael Nadal had just won his FIRST French Open title
• Three days after the Hill/Cabrera game David Tennant starred in the first return episode of Dr. Who
• Michael Schumacher won the United States Grand Prix the following weekend

Feeling old? Good. My job here is done.