I have no interest in being a step-father but my girlfriend’s son is soo clingy
DEAR DEIDRE: MY girlfriend’s son has started calling me ‘Dad’, and it’s making me want to run away from our relationship.
I’m not remotely paternal, so when the little boy is clingy towards me, I feel annoyed and trapped.
I’m 35 and my girlfriend is 32. She has a five-year-old from a previous relationship.
When we met, two years ago, I knew she had a child and I accepted he’d be part of our relationship. But as someone who has never wanted kids, I made it clear I wouldn’t be – and could never be – a dad to him. My girlfriend agreed.
Besides, the boy has got a dad who he sees half the week and every other weekend.
Things were fine until I moved in with my girlfriend. Now, her little boy runs up and grabs my hand whenever he sees me.
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He keeps asking if I’ll play football with him and wants to show me his drawings and schoolwork.
His mum thinks it’s sweet but it really irritates me.
I’d never be cruel to or deliberately hurt a child. I simply have no interest in kids and want to keep my distance.
DEIDRE SAYS: Spending time with a child and being kind isn’t the same as being a father.
If you don’t want to be around him at all, then maybe this relationship isn’t right for you.
You need to talk to your girlfriend about how you feel. In the meantime, my support pack on Step-families may be helpful.
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