Why is my child hurting his siblings?
DEAR DEIDRE: Our little boy has started to misbehave, hitting his younger brother and sister and lashing out at me and his mum.
He’s eight and our other kids are five and one. I’m his dad and we haven’t brought him up to be like this.
Last night he bit his baby sister, who had accidentally switched off a programme he was watching.
He went wild, shouting at her and then he bit her hand so that she’d drop the remote. The poor thing had done nothing wrong.
My wife sent him to bed early but I don’t know what’s got into him.
I’ve been having some mental health issues lately. I get depression so sometimes I can’t get myself out of bed and to be honest this is the last thing I need.
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He is as good as gold out in public and when I take him to play football but at home it’s a different story.
My wife and I are both 38. We’ve talked to the school and they say he’s very well-behaved there and has a nice set of friends.
DEIDRE SAYS: Children like to feel safe and supported and often find it difficult to articulate their feelings.
He’s witnessing some changes in his life. It may be scary for him seeing you laid up with depression. He may also feel pushed out by his younger siblings.
Speak to him about your illness and reassure him he hasn’t done anything wrong, you love him but sometimes it can take you a while to recover.
Put in some boundaries and praise him when he sticks to them. Make sure you are creating space for one-on-one time with him every day.
My support pack Stressed With The Kids provides other ideas.