Rick Scott would 'absolutely' support Trump in November—even if he's convicted

Medicare fraudster and U.S. Sen. Rick Scott is doing his bit for the destruction of liberal democracy, claiming that he’d vote for insurrectionist, self-described grabber of crotches and judge-described sexual assaulter, business fraud, (alleged!) top secret documents thief, and semi-ambulant absurdity Donald Trump—even if Trump is convicted of a crime.

Because the only way to halt the raging national crime wave that exists entirely in Republicans’ minds is to elect a criminal to the highest office in the land.

The Republican Party, which once swaddled itself in principled opposition to Soviet aggression, has become a wholly owned subsidiary of Vladimir Putin’s vodka- and evil-marinated brain, and all Putin had to do was compromise one debauched reality TV star. Normally you have to buy a $325 Cameo to get Rudy Giuliani to do embarrassing tricks for you, but Putin got his services for free.

Watching old-guard Republicans morph into humiliated wads of protoplasm in utter thrall to a Flamin’ Hot Cheeto Demon would be really effing funny if the stakes for Western democracy weren’t so damn high.