I Can't Stop Laughing at RNC Delegates Copying Trump's Ear Bandage

On night one of the Republican National Convention this week, former President Trump made his first public appearance since the attempt on his life at his Saturday rally, very conspicuously donning a misshapen bandage over the ear that was cut. Depending on who you ask, the appearance was either akin to Jesus Christ rising on the third day, or that one girl you went to high school with who was always showing up on the first day back in a boot. In any case, there's a lot that can be said about this man, but it simply can't be said that he doesn't know how to put on a damn show. While Twitter users made their little jokes about the undeniably comedic spectacle of it all, Trump supporters and RNC delegates, by contrast, were inspired. During day two of the convention on Tuesday, several were photographed wearing fake bandages or even paper squares over their ears in a demonstration of solidarity with the downtrodden billionaire who is now their official party nominee. According to at least one reporter at the RNC, the iconic accessory is being sold as merch to convention-goers. See below: Trump’s ear bandage the hottest new merchandise at the RNC, apparently pic.twitter.com/iriuIu8Hz4 — Cami Mondeaux (@cami_mondeaux) July 17, 2024 Trump supporters wear ear bandages at RNC pic.twitter.com/5Rimg85S9L — Baller Alert ???? (@balleralert) July 17, 2024 Explanations from attendees as to why, exactly, they are wearing comedically large fake band-aids over their ears are somehow even funnier than the imagery of it all. One delegate from Arizona, who wore a white piece of paper over his right ear, told CBS on Tuesday that the look is about to be “the newest fashion trend.” “Everybody in the world is going to be wearing these pretty soon,” the man, Joe Neglia, said. “Yesterday when he came in, and there was that eruption of love in the room, I thought, ‘What can I do to honor the truth? What can I possibly do?’” (Well, a lot of things, Joe!) “And then I saw the bandage and I thought, I can do that. So, I put it on simply to honor Trump and to express sympathy with him and unity with him," Neglia concluded. It's very touching; I might even shed a tear if they all weren't frothing at the mouth to decimate my access to a basic health service. Another Arizona delegate similarly wearing a white piece of paper on her ear said she was doing so “in solidarity with my president." OK! Look, I'm not a doctor. Who am I to say whether Trump really does or doesn't need that eyesore of a giant bandaid on his ear for health and safety reasons, and not just attention and sympathy points?? All I'm saying is, there are at least a couple of conspiracy theories that might be worth looking into. Ahem: Don Jr: Dad, the security at the door told me I can't bring my coke in. Trump: Give it to me, I have an idea. pic.twitter.com/1cXU8XeRQY — Alex Cole (@acnewsitics) July 16, 2024 Next, might I suggest Trump take a page from Regina George and cut holes in the chest of his shirts to reveal a bright purple bra??