Nuances of non-dual awareness - progress after "waking up" ?
I want to share clips from a recent exchange at the Waking Up Community that I found very useful. "Sam,":who is mentioned several times, is Sam Harris, whose WAKING UP App offers theory, lessons, and exercises on non-dual awareness.
From a questioner's post:
I accept, understand and find great peace in the fact that the self is an illusion.
[...] Once non-dual awareness is accepted, is there nothing else to “find”? (or not!)
[...] Is there an advanced course for those for whom non-dual awareness is now an accepted reality?
And from a respondent's comments:
Spoken language is notoriously imprecise and unreliable for discussing and communicating nonduality. So, my genuine apologies if I'm misunderstanding what you're saying, and I do not mean to make assumptions! From your descriptions (e.g. the quotes above), it sounds like you may have arrived (primarily) at a conceptual acceptance of no-self so far. Such as from examining the "no self" logical arguments and/or examining your own firsthand experience for evidence or lack of evidence of a self. Then, after careful inspection of this evidence, confirming and re-confirming that the inescapable conclusion is that there is no self (at least not in the way most people believe). Speaking of "accepting" this truth, as you do in your post, implies to me some (non-superfluous) role that your mind is still playing in recognizing this truth. And if that's true, that is all wonderful! And can be very beneficial. However, if that is primarily what you mean, then since you specifically asked...
From the questioner: I kind of want Sam to guide us into something beyond that acceptance. Or is that it?
Froml the responder: No, that (what I described above) certainly is not all of it! There is so much beyond this if you are interested (and it's 100% ok if you're not interested!). Experiential recognition of nonduality goes deep, but it's also hard to describe with words. Here are a few (far from comprehensive) descriptions I'll attempt. All of these are to be understood as being part of your normal life (e.g. just going about your normal day doing normal activities, and not just while meditating or in some "special" mental state), and also as being somewhat persistent rather than fleeting.
Feeling as though the boundaries separating you from your environment have completely dissolved such that your direct lived experience is that of a delocalized awareness.
Seeing your environment (e.g. your computer, or the trees) and viscerally feeling that it is all exactly no more and no less "you" than your body is. Literally no meaningful distinction. This can also feel like an immense "expansion" of you. An oceanic vastness. The opposite of contraction.
Seeing that your thoughts do not belong to you. They belong to the same indivisible happening that is also all sights, sounds, sensations, and other direct raw experience that's happening.
Related to the above, seeing that there is actually nothing here that your self-referential thoughts refer to. And seeing how this must necessarily be the case in any imagined future (and must have also been the case in the past). Thoughts are just another part of the impersonal happening that is constantly happening (this is not a poetic or metaphorical description, but a plain observational description of the way existence actually is). And as a result, nothing can feel personal.
And again to clarify since this can be so slippery to talk about, all these descriptions can become self-evident experientially. They do not require any thought, conceptual recognition, or reflection to feel and know. Put differently, imagine I gave you an acute amnesiac drug so that you temporarily forgot everything you know about science, about logic, and about "waking up" and anything and everything you've learned so far from this journey. This knowledge wipe would not in any way decrease your immediately experienced truth of these self-evident descriptions. You would not need to reference any understanding of waking up, observations or insights from meditation, or past knowledge of any kind to instantly recognize these descriptions in each lived moment as simply being what your subjective experience of existing is (granted, if I actually did temporarily wipe out all that knowledge while you were still recognizing nonduality, you might then say something like "Oh holy f*ck what's going on? This is super trippy and weird! Why am I everything?!" haha).
None of that is supposed to be a checklist of "experiences you're supposed to have." And you might already be experiencing every day precisely as described. But since this is often not emphasized (and I don't see Sam talk explicitly about it too much), I wanted to mention some of it to ensure you knew it was available in case that sounds like something that would be both new and of interest to you :)