Major Cringe: This Woman Is Getting All Dolled Up Just To Marry Chuck
Are you ready to cringe so hard that your face becomes permanently disfigured? Then check out this incredibly depressing story: This woman is getting all dolled up just to marry Chuck.
What the hell, lady? This is seriously making us literally squirm with secondhand embarrassment.
Yep, so right now in Louisville, Kentucky, something is going down that’s even cringier than TikTok-ers lip-syncing heartfelt love ballads to their celebrity crushes: 28-year-old real estate agent Geena Polk is spending all morning getting her hair and makeup done just to marry Chuck. That’s right, Chuck. Not some famous actor or a hot foreign guy with a fancy car or even Dave for that matter, but regular-ass Chuck. Like, doesn’t she know that when she shows up at the chapel with her three-hour mani and pedi and her $5,000 dress that it’s just going to be Chuck standing there at the altar Chucking it up?
If you could see how seriously Geena is taking her beauty routine as she prepares to do something as insignificant as committing to Chuck for life, you’d be beet-red with mortification. She’s even wearing the pearls her grandmother wore when she married her grandfather, as if marrying Chuck is anywhere near that important. Girl, what are you doing? Pull yourself together, take out those hair extensions, put on a Sea World sweatshirt, light up a cigarette, and go marry Chuck like Chuck deserves.
Honey, this is not the goddamn Oscars here. This is only your marriage to Chuck.
With her cleavage stacked in a push-up bra, her perfect smokey eye makeup, and her heart filled with love for Chuck, Geena is truly cringe incarnate right now. Hopefully, no one brings any cameras to her wedding today, because this is one day she is not going to want any evidence of whatsoever. Because as incredible as she looks, it’s embarrassingly all just to marry Chuck.