I’m on the floor struggling so badly being a stay-at-home mum – it’s a thankless task & my family’s attitudes don’t help
A STAY-AT-HOME mum has revealed that she is struggling with the “thankless task” of raising her children, and has called for more recognition for the role she plays in society.
The mum said that she feels completely under-appreciated for the hard work she puts in, and struggles with a lack of self-worth.
“Currently on the floor, I know I’m capable of lots and I’m a good mum, but it’s a thankless task, both from family, day to day and society as a whole”, she told broadcaster Zoe Hardman and Georgia Dayton on their podcast Made By Mammas.
“More recognition for stay at home mums would help self-worth, as we don’t get it from anywhere else.”
“Stay at home mums have the hardest job in the world”, Zoe said, agreeing with the mum’s sentiment.
Georgia added that she understands that stay at home mums don’t have as much of a voice as working mums, because their focus is solely in their children.
She advised the mum to go out and meet other stay at home mums, to help her to feel more seen and supported.
“It’s very easy for stay at home mums to be overlooked, because there isn’t necessarily anyone always talking about the day to day.”
Zoe also pointed out that many mums don’t have any choice but to stay at home, as the UK has the worst paternity offer in Europe.
Additionally, with skyrocketing childcare costs, it is not economically viable for many mums to return to work after having children.
“How are we ever supposed to be equal in parenting, if one parent, predominantly mums, has to stay at home, and is out of the workplace for many years.”
“There no support for stay at home mums, they just have to get on with it.”
Zoe said that society should focus on stay at home mums having the most important job, and realise how brilliant and hardworking they are.
This way, stay at home mums wouldn’t be battling with their self-worth, she said.
Georgia added that stay at home mums have no breaks, and aren’t able to take time for themselves.
“So many people think that they can’t ask for help, because you don’t have to have the child care, but you do”, she said.
Bedtime tips for mums
IF YOU'RE fed up with your toddler refusing to go to bed, then keep reading.
A child health expert has revealed the five steps you need to take to calm your kid down for a good night’s sleep.
Dr Kaylene Henderson spoke to Nine Honey about what to do if your toddler just won’t seem to settle for the night.
Each child is different and needs a different amount of sleep depending on their age, but these easy steps can make the evenings a little easier for parents.
Just like adults, children need enough time to wind down before being put to bed.
One step to take is to ensure they have enough time to properly wind down after a busy day.
The expert recommends one to two hours to transition toddlers into bed time.
And it’s just as important that parents take the time to wind down and be more present to help toddlers feel calmer.
Dr Henderson explains: “Our children are like barometers of household tension after all.
“If we want our children to wind down, we need to make an effort to switch off – from our phones, our work emails and from the many other sources or distraction competing for our attention.”
We’ve all been told to turn our screens off before going to bed because the blue light stops our brains from producing melatonin, our body’s sleep hormone.
So the expert suggests turning it off 60 to 90 minutes before bed to ensure children get a good night’s sleep.
Music and meditation can also help get your child into the land of nod claims the expert.
She adds that slow-paced music, of around 60 beats per minute, can help their breath, heart rate, brain waves, and relax their muscles.
“There are also lovely guided meditations developed specifically to help young children to get to sleep at night.
“Headspace for Kids dedicated section on sleep that is customised to three age groups: five and under, six to eight and nine to 12 – and you can try it for free,” she adds.
Finally, Dr Henderson recommends sticking to a nightly routine every night to help your toddler drift off easily.
When children know what to expect every night they find it easier to relax, and of course, fall asleep.
One of the best ways to do this is with a bedtime story.
She adds: “Remember, the goal is to transition our little ones towards sleep, so bedtime stories tend to be the perfect tool, in the perfect place.”
“You really need a break, being a stay at home mum is more than a full time job, and so therefore you do need to allow yourself little breaks.”
“You’re not a robot, I completely agree with you”, Zoe echoed.
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