‘A shell of my former self’: Catholic clergy abuse victims recall decades of abuse at hearing, call on Diocese of Oakland to ‘do the right thing’

OAKLAND — Several clergy abuse victims confronted the Diocese of Oakland’s bishop in a U.S. bankruptcy courtroom on Friday, describing in searing detail how they were groomed, raped and “terrorized” for decades by Catholic priests across the East Bay.

The testimonials capped a two-day hearing for 15 clergy sexual assault victims to air their allegations in court while the Diocese of Oakland seeks to settle roughly 350 lawsuits filed against it in recent years. Last month, the diocese’s proposed paying at least $117 million into a trust for those victims over the next several years — an offer the victims’ attorneys roundly panned as “a scam and a sham.”

On Friday, several abuse victims stared directly at Bishop Michael C. Barber — sitting mere feet away — while imploring the diocese to do right by the hundreds of victims suing the church. Some of them had not yet told their own families of the horrors they endured.

One woman described being molested by a priest during a confessional in Pinole while just 7 years old, leading her to use drugs to numb the memory of the encounter. Another person said he “stopped at that young age learning how to dream” after allegedly being raped as a child and suffering an anal fissure. The injury continues to cause medical issues for him all these decades later.

Often, the victims recounted growing up with devout Catholic parents who — despite meager incomes — used what little money they had to pay to send their children to Catholic school. They were usually told that priests amounted to direct representatives of God, with their words serving as law to parishioners.

One woman tearfully described being repeatedly disrobed and molested by a priest, causing her to grow “resentful and angry,” while she became “a shell” of her “former self.” Thoughts of having to undress in front of a doctor led to her not wanting to have children.

That trauma persisted for decades, and reemerged when she was diagnosed with breast cancer. She lamented how the disease could have been caught earlier had she not been fearful of being touched by a physician.

“I am heartbroken and will always mourn the children I didn’t have,” the woman said. “The reality is my life expectancy is diminished. I have so many regrets.”

The Bay Area News Group does not typically identify victims of sexual assault.

The clergy mentioned by the victims Friday included Stephen Keistle, John T. McCracken, George Francis and Donald Brodersen.

Near the end of the two-hour hearing, Bishop Barber issued a “sincere and complete, unconditional apology” and acknowledging to Judge William Lafferty how the victims were rightfully feeling “anger, repulsion and anguish.”

“I am truly sorry,” Barber told Lafferty, while reading from a prepared statement. He called the priests described by those victims as “evil-doers” whom he condemned for having committed “the gravest betrayal” of their parishioners.

Friday’s hearing came as the diocese winds its way through Chapter 11 bankruptcy proceedings, which began earlier this year as the church faced a flood of lawsuits alleging widespread sexual abuse among clergy. Those lawsuits were made possible by a new law that temporarily reopened the window for filing decades-old abuse claims.

Thousands of other lawsuits have been filed against other dioceses across the state, leading to similar bankruptcy filings by other Catholic church leaders. Victim advocates have steadfastly condemned such bankruptcy filings, noting how they effectively pause any litigation while bankruptcy judges review each diocese’s finances and assets.

The proposed settlement by the Diocese of Oakland calls for it to create a trust for abuse victims totaling at least $117 million over the next several years. The church also proposed handing over the title to a Livermore property that could grow the trust’s value between $43 million and $81 million, based on the church’s perceived value of the land. In addition, all the rights and interests of its insurance policies would go to the trust, potentially allowing abuse victims to seek money from the diocese’s insurers.

The victims’ advocates have called the proposal “ridiculous” and “pathetic,” noting how the proposed payout was far less than other approved settlements. About two decades ago, another settlement involving the Oakland diocese dispersed about $1 million per victim. More recently, a judge in October approved an $880 million settlement for the 1,350 people who sued the Archdiocese of Los Angeles.

After the hearing, the victims’ attorneys and advocates criticized Barber’s statement as “hollow.”

“He shifted the blame almost completely on the abusers, and said nothing about the guilt of the enablers,” said Anne Barrett Doyle, co-director of the website BishopAccountability.org.

“This is not some historical problem we can just pass off and sweep under the rug,” added Rick Simons, co-liaison counsel for the clergy abuse cases in Northern California. “Actions, not words, are what we need. And Bishop Barber’s actions are directly contradictory to his crafted words.”

Several victims also called for the diocese to do more for them, with one man flatly saying that “it feels as though the diocese is more interested in protecting its assets.”

He recounted having “complied out of fear” when — as a boy in the 1970s — he was told to meet a priest alone in a church library, where he was allegedly drugged and then raped. Afterward, he said the priest got on his knees and told the boy that “God has a plan for all of us, and this is part of mine.” The priest then allegedly added that if the boy told anyone, he’d go to hell, “or worse.”

Turning to Barber, the man said simply: “Do the right thing.”

“Ask yourself: What would Jesus do in this situation?” the man added.

Jakob Rodgers is a senior breaking news reporter. Call, text or send him an encrypted message via Signal at 510-390-2351, or email him at jrodgers@bayareanewsgroup.com.