Outlander Recap: It Will Not Be Today

We’re in the thick of the Revolutionary War here — the Battle of Monmouth is upon us! — and Outlander is taking a little time in “Written in My Own Heart’s Blood” to consider fathers and sons because sure, why not? There is, of course, the selfless offer from Buck MacKenzie to make the trip through the stones back to Bree to inform her of the detour Roger’s plan has taken just in case that letter Roger leaves his wife in the secret desk drawer in 1739 goes unnoticed in 1980. When Roger asks why Buck would risk so much when he could go home to his own time and own son, Buck’s response is that Roger, Jemmy, even Roger’s father, they are all Buck’s sons. He wants to do this for his family as a father. (We watch Bree miraculously — ridiculously, if we’re being honest — find the letter and run through the stones as Mandy leads the charge to her dad, so Buck’s big gesture may all be for naught.) And while Buck might be a little ticked off with Roger for only now informing him of who his birth parents are, he really still does owe the guy for, as he puts it, “the trouble at Alamance.” I’ll never get over how cool Roger is about that whole thing, but Buck, with his sad, unrequited love story with his own wife and the whole “you’re all my sons” gesture, is quite easy to like.

More moving, however, is the moment shared between Lord John and William once John and Ian save the captured British captain from the Hessians. John and Ian murder the hell out of those dudes. There’s a whole thing with Ian hesitating to kill one of them, thinking about his promises to Rachel, no doubt, but even he goes back to finish the job — and Ian and William seem to make some sort of quiet, manly peace after everything that’s transpired between the two of them. But it’s Lord John who brings his bruised and beaten son back to a nearby British Army camp.

While William was happy to see his father and grateful to be free, he can’t let go of the betrayal he still feels knowing he’s been lied to his entire life. Lord John’s first attempt to remind William who he is could’ve gone better. Something tells me that, hey, you were captured and tortured by those Hessians because of who you are and who your family is isn’t as reassuring as Lord John wants it to be. But still, when an angry William is stomping around in that army tent and spits at Lord John that while he has so many names to choose from — Ransom, Ellesmere, even Fraser — one he would never consider is that of Grey, it stings. William is still processing everything, and Lord John is an easy target for his pain, but cool your jets, bro! Lord John sacrificed so much to give this kid the best life he could manage. When William asks again, “Who am I?” and John’s reply is, “You are my son. You are my son!” well, my heart breaks into about one million pieces for the guy. William has a lot on his plate at the moment since he comes to learn that while he was away Jane was arrested for killing Harkness, and it’s doubtful that William and Jamie will become buddies any time soon, but it would be nice to have William and John make real amends before it’s too late. I mean, if anyone needs to watch that montage of all the violence and death and war Claire has witnessed in her life, it’s probably our idealistic little Loyalist William. Get a clue, my man!

While the father and son talk throughout the episode is effective, it’s not what “Written in My Own Heart’s Blood” is really about. There’s a reason why the title credits end on a shot of who we can assume is Frank and little Bree at a museum, standing in front of Dennis Malone Carter’s Molly Pitcher at the Battle of Monmouth — this is Claire’s story. These days, Molly Pitcher is recognized as a sort of catch-all nickname for the women, some named and commended and some unknown to history, who served in various ways during the Revolutionary War. Consider Claire Fraser Outlander’s very own Molly Pitcher. Notice how we don’t, save for one brief scene, leave Claire’s point of view during the Battle of Monmouth to follow Jamie and his men taking on the Redcoats. We only hear of General Lee’s call for retreat and what honestly sounds like a very cool George Washington/Jamie Fraser team up on the battlefield. Instead, we spend the battle with Claire, who, leading up to this day, does seem to be having some sort of existential crisis.

Poor Claire! She’s been through so much! Remember that All the Death I Have Witnessed montage? So much! On the precipice of yet another battle to add to her harrowing, impressive list, she tells Jamie that something is different this time. She can feel the “abyss” and the “futility” of life pulling on her. And while, perhaps, Outlander wants you to take Claire’s worries as a sign of terrible things to come for Jamie as he heads off and leaves her back at the field hospital, it turns out Claire is the one we should’ve been worried about. That dreamy bedside chat about only ever feeling safe and unburdened in each other’s arms? Their farewell I love yous? Jamie’s promise that he will not die today? It is all TV code for bad stuff is headed this way, but did anyone (who hasn’t read the books) guess that the bad stuff would be a shot straight to Claire’s gut from a retreating Redcoat just as Jamie, returning from battle, called out “Sassenach” with such relief you could taste it? I would guess not! Jamie, based on the way his face morphs into horror at the sight of red blooming in his wife’s abdomen, certainly had no idea it was coming.

The last ten minutes of this episode are a reminder yet again that Outlander only works so well because of the bond between Claire and Jamie that it’s taken great care to prop up throughout seven seasons and the bond between Caitriona Balfe and Sam Heughan because this is some heartbreaking shit. Already this season, we watched Claire completely undone by Jamie’s “death,” and now it’s the big guy’s turn. Jamie goes fully unhinged about it all at with record-breaking speed.

We’ve already learned that the lead surgeon at this field hospital is a dipshit; Truly nothing on this show gives me as much joy as watching Claire shit all over arrogant men with her skill and knowledge as if she couldn’t care less what they think because she knows she’s right, just as she does this dude who tries to tell her that a woman couldn’t possibly know anything worthwhile about medicine and does, in fact, tell her to stop being so hysterical at one point. Now, credit where credit’s due: Once he gets a front-row view of Claire stopping a soldier’s lung from collapsing, he does realize he misjudged her. He even calls her Dr. Fraser by the end of their time together. However, on the whole, he sucks. The moment he gets a look at Claire’s injury after Jamie carries her inside and places her on his table, he tells him that the musket ball is in too deep and there’s nothing he can do here. In fact, he says that there are men back at the main camp who he can actually save, so he’s going to head out. Can you even believe? Jamie screams at the doctor on his way out: “May the devil eat your soul and salt it well first, you whore!” And honestly, why aren’t we cursing more of our enemies like this these days? More curses in 2025, I say!

Jamie’s fully unhinged at this point as Claire continues to bleed profusely on the table in front of him. You know how this season’s opening credits have that mysterious shot of hands covered in blood? Well, those are Jamie’s hands, and that’s Claire’s blood, isn’t that nice? It is at this moment that one of Jamie’s young soldiers shows up to inform him that General Lee is demanding he return to the battlefield. It’s true that this soldier not being able to read the room — the room being that Jamie’s wife and love of his life and sun and moon and stars is dying right in front of him — is insane, but Jamie demanding he remove his shit so he can use Claire’s blood to write his resignation letter to Lee in blood on the kid’s back is, let’s call it, super fucked up. There is a long list of characters on this show who could use therapy, but Jamie Fraser is easily at the top.

Jamie sends the kid off with his cute lil’ flesh and blood post-it note and returns to his regularly scheduled programming, which includes, telling Claire to live, informing God that he will not take his wife, and repeating the phrase he used to ease Claire’s fears about the abyss of what comes after death while they were looking up at the stars, “the stars will not burn out, nor will we.” That last thing is enough to make you want to slide down a wall while crying.

Finally, after what seems like ten years, Claire, who, it must be said, does not look great, calls out for Denny. Denny can help! She knows he is just down the road at the main camp and he is the only surgeon even possibly capable of saving her life. Denny and Rachel arrive (with cheese that Claire realizes could be used to make her some penicillin because that woman is nothing if not a multitasker) and put Claire under. Denny will do his best to keep her alive, but let’s not pretend that the situation is dire. Jamie is left with nothing to do but hold his wife and beg her not to leave him.