Nikki Glaser's Golden Globes 2025 Opening Monologue: Biggest Roasts of Timothee Chalamet, Selena Gomez's Fiance Benny Blanco, Ben Affleck & More

Nikki Glaser just wrapped up her opening monologue at the 2025 Golden Globe Awards on Sunday (January 5) at the Beverly Hilton Hotel in Beverly Hills, Calif.

The 40-year-old comedian had some zingers and hilarious comments…with some shocking statements peppered in too!

We’ve gathered some of the biggest one liners as a recap.

Keep reading to find out more…

“If you’re watching on CBS, hello, if you’re watching on Paramount+ you have six days left to cancel your free trial.”

“I look out and I see some of the hardest working actors in show business — and by that, I mean your servers.”

“I’m not here to roast you. And how could I? You’re all so famous, so talented, so powerful. I mean, you could really do anything — except tell the country who to vote for. But it’s okay. You’ll get them next time!”

“[Selena Gomez and her] new fiancé Benny Blanco. And Benny Blanco is here because of the genie who granted him that wish. Man. Lucky guy.”

“The Bear, The Penguin, Baby Reindeer. These are not just things found in RFK‘s freezer. These are TV shows nominated tonight.”

“I really feel like I’ve made it. I’m in a room full of producers at the Beverly Hilton and this time all of my clothes are on. It was worth it.”

“Wicked, Queer, Nightbitch — these are not just words Ben Affleck yells after he orgasms. These are some of the incredible movies nominated tonight.”

“What a year you’ve had! Glenn [Powell], you were in everything: Twisters, Hitman, my head when I’m having sex with my boyfriend,”

“Zendaya you were incredible in Dune. I woke up for all of your scenes. And Challengers? That was more sexually charged than Diddy’s credit card. The after party is not going to be as good this year, but we have to move on. I know ‘Stanley Tucci Freak Off’ doesn’t have the same ring to it.”

“Harrison Ford. I was talking to Harrison back stage and after he gave me his drink order.”

“Timothee Chalamet, you have the most gorgeous eyelashes — on your upper lip. That is such a good look. I read that your singing voice [in A Complete Unknown] that even Bob Dylan admitted that it was absolutely horrible.”

“I did not know much about Wicked going into this year because I had friends in high school.”

— “Nicole Kidman is here for Babygirl. That movie was so good, I give it two fingers up.”

— “Eddie Redmayne did TV this year. He’s nominated for Peacock’s The Day of the Jackal. It’s about a top-secret elite sniper that no one can see — because he’s on Peacock.”