‘I was just a child when I saw my mum being killed’

When Roann Court was 15 years old, she witnessed her mother, Claire Marshall, being killed.

Claire had left her ex-boyfriend after being abused by him during their 10-year relationship, Roann tells Metro. However, 18 months later, in January 2009, he came to their house ‘like a lion stalking his prey,’ she says.

The man asked Roann to leave the house and put her younger sister’s car seat in the car. 

‘Then, he pounced on my mum and started punching her,’ she recalls. ‘He proceeded to take a pen knife out of his pocket and started slashing at her neck.’ After, he got a knife from the kitchen and went on to, in Roann’s words, ‘pretty much decapitate’ her mother in the living room. 

Roann, now 31, says that watching her mother die in such a brutal way was ‘horrific’.

‘I remember going out of the house and trying to get help,’ she adds. ‘Then I went back in and got my sister out. I was going in another time to try and help my mum when he came out of the kitchen with a larger knife. He tried to attack me, but I managed to get out.’

Every year, 200 children are bereaved through homicide, like Roann and her sister. 

She doesn’t remember much of the early days after her mum’s death but Roann has since grappled with her mental health.

‘I have PTSD and struggle on a daily basis with anxiety and being very hypervigilant,’ she explains. ‘I have had therapy, and I’m very, very lucky to be in a good mindset right now.’

According to Katherine Cavallo, a UKCP accredited Systemic Family and Couple Psychotherapist, losing a parent in this way is profound and will have long-lasting consequences on a child’s mental wellbeing, especially in terms of complex grief and trauma.

‘The closer the child is to the incident, the more profoundly traumatic and longstanding the consequences will be,’ she explains. 

Katherine adds that many children who have lost a parent to domestic homicide will have already witnessed abuse. ‘When considering the long-term consequences for the child, it’s important to take into account the context they are likely to be growing up in; the homicide is very unlikely to be an isolated incident,’ she says. 

Femicide Census found that 110 women were killed by men in 2020, and of the 111 men who were ‘implicated in their killings’, 53% perpetrators were thought to have a history of abuse and violence against women. 

Prior abuse is common in cases of domestic femicide; Killed Women, an organisation supporting the families who have lost loved ones, surveyed family members and found that 66% were aware that the killer had a history of violence or abuse. 

From March 2020 to the year ending March 2022, 67.3% of domestic homicide victims were female, with the suspect being male in 241 of the 249 cases. In 74.7% of the cases, the suspect was a male partner or ex-partner.

This was the case for Joanna Simpson, who has since had a charity set up in her name to improve the care, protection and support for children impacted by domestic violence and homicide. 

Joanna ran a successful 5-star bed and breakfast business in Ascot and was married with two children. She was also the victim of domestic abuse by means of coercive control, isolation and intimidation, which culminated in severe violence.

Although she had started divorce proceedings, in 2010, at age 46, Joanna was battered to death by her estranged husband, Robert Brown, in the vicinity of her children (aged 9 and 10). It was one week before the finalisation of their divorce.

In 2017, The Office of National Statistics found that nearly half (49%) of women murdered by their partner or ex-partner are killed less than a month after separation, while 79% were killed within six months of separation and 90% killed within a year. 

It was five days after she was killed that Joanna’s body was found buried in a pre-dug grave in Windsor Great Park.

In 2014, her mother, Diana Parkes, and close friend, Hetti Barkworth-Nanton set up the The Joanna Simpson Foundation, because Joanna ‘believed it important that all children should have a safe, secure and loving environment’. 

Diana and Hetti describe children as the ‘forgotten victims’ of these crimes and through the foundation support youngsters who have witnessed domestic abuse or homicide heal and rebuild their lives.

It’s an initiative that is desperately needed. ‘We know that, today, there is no consistent response for children affected by these crimes,’ Hetti tells Metro. ‘They get given little agency of their own, and many can move from one foster parent to another in a short space of time.’

‘There is no consistent approach in terms of what happens next to children after domestic homicide,’ explain Diana and Hetti together. ‘It is down to individual circumstances, although we do understand that some children are put into foster care and have a number of homes in the first few years.

‘We know of a family where the children have only been able to live with their grandmother after she trained as a foster parent.’

Ellen Milazzi is Head of the National Homicide Service at Victim Support. ‘In the immediate aftermath of losing a parent to homicide, children and young people will be dealing with trauma, grief and loss,’ she explains.

‘People eventually learn to forge a “new normal”, but this can take a very long time, and they will likely carry their loss for a lifetime. Even years later, the emotional and physical trauma can be visceral.’ 

For Daniel Wing, whose mother Tina was murdered when he was just a baby, it’s taken 30 years for him to be able to understand his grief. 

At the time, 31-year-old Tina was living in a mental health facility for postnatal depression and rehabilitation. She went for an unaccompanied walk around the grounds and four hours later her body was found with multiple stab wounds and strangulation marks.

Tina’s murder remains unsolved (Daniel’s father was acquitted after going on trial) and the impact on her family was profound; not least because of a notable lack of support. 

‘I lived in fear up until I was 31 because I never had full answers or the opportunity to understand the suppressed grief I was feeling,’ says Daniel. ‘The fear impacted every part of my life – everything was a struggle.’ 

Daniel tells Metro how grateful he feels to have grown up with his grandmother in a very loving household – but also describes how, in the immediate aftermath of his mother’s murder, his family had to battle to keep him.

‘The authorities wanted to put me in with a Black family, because of my mixed heritage,’ Daniel explains. ‘So Nan had to really fight on top of having to navigate this unsolved murder. I just think that it’s really disgusting that there was no one to say, “I’m really sorry for your loss, we’re doing everything we can”’. 

Daniel’s grandmother and the rest of his family were even too scared to seek counselling – they were worried that they might be seen as ‘weak’ and Daniel would be taken away from them.

Hetti explains that the lack of support experienced by Daniel’s family is still all too common today. 

‘There is little, if any, guidance available for family members when they take responsibility for the children in circumstances where they are also dealing with their own grief and trauma,’ she says.

Diana adds that the way the case is reported and perceived by the public can also impact a child and their family. 

‘Friends at school and parents of friends might read about what’s happened,’ Diana adds. ‘This can have drastic effects on children’s social lives and their school experience. Not only does the child’s life change through losing a parent, but it also may change in all their existing relationships – this is a huge impact that not many may consider.’

Roann was deeply impacted by this. ‘I remember reading a lot of articles about what happened to Mum, and also about her history,’ she says. ‘One of the hardest things was that my mum felt like a side note; like she didn’t really matter and it was all about him.

‘My mum was amazing,’ Roann recalls. ‘She always had a smile on her face. She loved listening to Elvis and music; I remember watching EastEnders with her when she came home from work. 

‘She was my best friend, and I was very lucky to have her as my mum. She couldn’t really cook, but she tried her best which I find is funny. She loved rugby and following football.’

This is the Claire that Roann would have liked to have heard about in the aftermath of her killing. 

Ellen adds that ‘small acts of respect, such as using photos which best represent the victim in a positive and kind way’ have been found to be helpful to families who will be aware of coverage surrounding the case.

Today, Roann says she feels incredibly fortunate to be in a good mindset. She’s currently doing a psychology and counselling degree after all she’s been through, with the aim of giving children a voice that they ‘don’t always have’ after they’ve lost a parent because of homicide.

Meanwhile, Daniel is still searching for answers. He continues to request updates from the police and last year made a documentary called  Who Murdered You, Mum?.

Yet, despite all he’s been through, Daniel has a message of hope for others who’ve lost parents to homicide, which is to do what you can to honour that person ‘in any way that feels right’.

‘Go to the places they visited or wanted to visit, do the things they never had the opportunity to. Reflect and think about conversations you had with and about them and use it to remind yourself you are still living; even more so now because they are no longer here to experience it.’

‘That keeps their spirit alive, and I think that gives you a bit of purpose,’ he says.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing jess.austin@metro.co.uk. 

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