Ashley Tisdale Explains Her Decision to Leave a 'Toxic' Group of Mom Friends

Ashley Tisdale is opening up about her decision to leave a “toxic mom group.”

The 40-year-old High School Musical alum has been married to husband Christopher French since 2014. They share daughters Jupiter Iris, 4, and Emerson Clover, 1.

In a recent post on her personal blog, Ashley revealed that she had taken a step back from a group of friends. She provided more insight into the decision in an essay published on The Cut.

Keep reading to find out more…

In the essay, the actress says she was “craving connection with other mothers” after welcoming Jupiter in 2021.

Ashley wrote that she was introduced to a group of moms via a friend, noting that she was “impressed” by the women and “all of the amazing things they had going on” in their personal and professional lives.

“I was certain that I’d found my village,” she wrote. However, Ashley said that the feeling wasn’t long-lasting for her.

She explained: “But over time, I began to wonder whether that was really true. I remember being left out of a couple of group hangs, and I knew about them because Instagram made sure it fed me every single photo and Instagram Story. Another time, at one of the mom’s dinner parties, I realized where I sat with her — which was at the end of the table, far from the rest of the women. I was starting to feel frozen out of the group, noticing every way that they seemed to exclude me.”

“At first, I tried not to take things personally. It’s not like people aren’t allowed to get together without me — and maybe there were perfectly good reasons that I hadn’t been invited. We were all busy, life was hectic. I told myself it was all in my head and it wasn’t a big deal,” she recalled.

While realizing that “a growing distance” was developing between her and the other moms, she said that she recalled an experience where she noticed another woman being iced out of the group when she first joined it.

“I’d picked up on hints of a weird dynamic, but at the time, I didn’t dwell on it too much. I was just so happy to have found these incredible, smart, funny women. Now it seemed that this group had a pattern of leaving someone out. And that someone had become me,” she realized.

“Why me? The truth is, I don’t know and I probably never will. What I do know is that it took me back to an unpleasant but familiar feeling I thought I’d left behind years ago. Here I was sitting alone one night after getting my daughter to bed, thinking, Maybe I’m not cool enough? All of a sudden, I was in high school again, feeling totally lost as to what I was doing ‘wrong’ to be left out,” she admitted.

Ashley said that she felt the need to address her feelings directly “because I’m a mom,” writing, “I knew that I had to speak up for myself, just like I would want my daughters to do.”

She recalled texting the group, adding that her message “didn’t exactly go over well.”

“Surely, it would have been easier to disappear without explanation — and that would have allowed all of us to convince ourselves that we simply ‘drifted apart,’ ” she wrote.

“But from the feedback I’ve received since I started talking about this, I now know I’m far from the only mother who’s been brought to tears by members of a group that’s supposed to lift everyone up,” she added.

Elsewhere in the essay, Ashley said that she “never considered the moms to be bad people,” except for “maybe” one of them.

However, she noted that the group’s dynamic simply wasn’t working for her anymore, an experience that she realized wasn’t unique to her alone.

“I had more than one friend reach out and say, ‘You’re so brave.’ I thought that was such an interesting response. Why, I wondered, is it so scary to talk about this? Motherhood has enough challenges without having to wonder if the people around you are on your side. You deserve to go through motherhood with people who actually, you know, like you. And if you have to wonder if they do, here’s the hard-earned lesson I hope you’ll take to heart: It’s not the right group for you. Even if it looks like they’re having the best time on Instagram,” she concluded.

If you missed it, Ashley recently made a big revelation about her name.