40 Things I Miss Now I Am a Mother of 'Two Under Two'

What the *$&£$ ??

That was my reaction every time I had to get up for my firstborn -- which was roughly every two hours.

Nobody told me it would be that hard. Having my first baby was probably the biggest shock to my system... I felt like I had been through a high-speed washing machine cycle.

It took me months to straighten out all the wrinkles... months after which -- bam -- baby number 2 arrived.

So here I am with two adorable little girls and a long list of things that I miss about my old life.




To name but a few:

1. Sleep



2. Sleeping



3. Waking up because of the sun... never mind, in London there is no sun



4. Waking up because of my alarm clock at 6:00 a.m. not because of a baby who wants to comfort feed at 10:00 p.m., 12:00 a.m., 2:00 a.m., 4:00 a.m., and finally at 6:00 a.m. Oh and also at 3:00 a.m. because of a toddler who wants milk.



5. Showering without an audience



6. Showering for more than 5 minutes



7. Going to the bathroom when I need to instead of when both kids are napping... Well, sometimes, I do, and then...



8. I miss using the bathroom without four little eyes staring at me



9. Reading real books without flaps, music, or pictures



10. Reading an article (hell, even a headline) in one sitting



11. Sending messages and emails with correct spelling, grammar, and punctuation



12. Not knowing who Peppa the Pig or Spot the Dog are



13. Listening to my own music instead of Little Baby Bum and Mother Goose Club nursery rhymes... all day long



14. Not humming tunes in my head of all the songs my toddler listens to



15. Eating out of my own plate -- uninterrupted -- instead of eating leftovers from my toddler's hands while I nurse a baby



16. Wearing heels



17. Sleeping



18. The days when my phone and iPad belonged to me and I could use them without fear of being mugged by a toddler



19. Cooking full meals instead of ordering pizza



20. Having those meals go down well with an adult audience instead of thrown back at me in disgust by a toddler



21. Waking up next to my husband and not next to one of the babies



22. Waking up without a little foot on my face or a head digging into my back



23. Going out to shop and not because the kids need fresh air and a walk



24. Talking to my husband about things other than poop, food, and kids schedules



25. Talking to anyone about anything other than poop, food, and kids schedules



26. Actually, any human interaction with someone taller than 2 feet.



27. Being on time



28. Staying up late without worrying about having to wake up early the next morning



29. An empty laundry basket



30. An empty sink



31. A house that stays clean and organized for more than one hour



32. Reading in bed before sleeping instead of crashing on the couch from exhaustion



33. Going out to dinner at 8:00 p.m. instead of going to bed by then



34. Leaving the house with a small purse instead of a large bag with a supermarket and pharmacy inside



35. Nobody giving me advice about every little child-related thing



36. Traveling with only a carry-on instead of a check in luggage, a carry-on, a purse, a food bag, a stroller, a stuffed animal, and a blankie



37. Making restaurant reservations based on when we want to eat and not based on nap schedules



38. Walking around the house without tripping on legos



39. Wearing clothes that stay clean the WHOLE... ENTIRE... DAY



40. SLEEEEEEEEP

The funny thing about this seemingly constant state of sleep deprivation I'm in, though, is that I can't possibly imagine a better alternative.

Maybe it's the lack of sleep talking

But maybe... having kids really is that wonderful... lack of sleep and all.

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