15 Things Therapists Actually Want You To Know
Don’t worry, they won’t Google you or say hi to you at the bar.
Therapy can be mysterious and intimidating, especially if you don't know what to expect. So BuzzFeed Health spoke with three psychologists who all have extensive experience with psychotherapy: Stephanie Smith, Ph.D., clinical psychologist in Colorado, Ryan Howes, Ph.D., clinical psychologist and professor at Fuller Graduate School of Psychology, and Lynn Bufka, Ph.D., associate executive director of Practice Research and Policy at the American Psychological Association. Here's what they wish people knew about therapy:
It's not really a therapist's job to give you advice.
They're not here to tell you if you should call off your marriage or quit your job. "The real job of therapy is to get to know yourself better and change the way you're thinking, the way you're behaving, or the way you're understanding the world," says Smith. "The process of therapy is not to give good give advice."
Sure, they might tell you about strategies to cope with a mental illness like depression, anxiety, or bipolar disorder, but when it comes to your personal life decisions, they're more of a facilitator. "Do you really want to come to therapy to give your power away to someone else or do you want to learn to have that power on your own?" says Howes.
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They probably see a therapist, too.
"I would never trust a therapist who hadn't been to therapy," says Howes. And according to these experts, most psychologists do see their own therapists — maybe not all the time, but at least at some point in their careers. Most graduate psychology programs even require that candidates participate in therapy, says Smith.
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Most therapists don't prescribe medication.
That's typically the job of a psychiatrist or a primary care provider — not a psychologist or social worker, says Bufka. However, your therapist can coordinate with another provider to help you start or end a medication, if that's something you're interested in.
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