35 Tweets About The Sheer Joy That Is Granny's House
Everybody needs a break from time to time, whether from the incessant demands of caregiving or the incessant commands from the people who are caring for you.
Enter: Grandma’s house. A space of joy, freedom, sweets and screen time. When the kids are there, parents can relish small luxuries such as going to the bathroom all by themselves.
Here, some of the funniest parents on X (formerly Twitter) describe the magic of going to Grandma’s.
“Shows just kept coming on randomly one after another, it was wild!” -my child raised on Netflix, after visiting her grandma with cable.
— The Dad (@thedad) April 23, 2021
After 3 days at her house, Grandma sent the kids back with glowing reviews. But then I unpacked their bags and found homemade slime. Well-played, Grandma. Well-played.
— SpacedMom (@copymama) April 9, 2018
If you’re looking for Christmas gift ideas for my child, they wear a size “sleepover at Grandma’s house.”
— Amanda Marcotte | Mediocre Mommy (@storiesofamom) December 10, 2019
Trying to figure out what to serve Grandma for dinner and our 5 y/o daughter says, “Pasta. She likes pasta. She makes the best Spaghetti-O’s.”
— NicholasG (@Dad_At_Law) August 30, 2022
Me: Omg I need a break, they are driving me crazy. I need a break so badly. I can’t remember the last time I had a break.
— Mommy Needs A Life (@mom_needsalife) January 15, 2020
*Grandma takes the kids*
Me: Well, now wtf am I supposed to do?
My parents are married and live together but my toddler has already figured out it’s “Grandma’s house”
— Parenting Presently (The Mom Hack) (@presentparent_) September 18, 2023
4-year-old: I like grandma. She doesn't say words I don't like.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 21, 2017
Me: Like what?
4: No.
4yo: Daddy, I’ll miss you when you’re dead but I’m also gonna be a little excited because then I get to go live at grandma’s house
— Lil Bit ???? (@LizerReal) October 11, 2021
My husband: ... pic.twitter.com/dpEMbi9Ij0
one weekend at grandma and grandpas and the baby is apparently just like, oh yeah i walk now by the way. almost reassuring to know that you and your overbearing parenting style were in fact the problem.
— am rod (@arod_twit) September 3, 2023
4: when was the last time you checked in on your mother?
— mom mom mom mom mom (@notmythirdrodeo) July 22, 2020
me: is that your way of saying you want to go to grandma’s?
I dropped my kids off at their Grandma's, came home and was able to use the bathroom in peace.
— A Bearer Of Dad News (@HomeWithPeanut) June 6, 2018
I also happened to fall asleep on the toilet and if that's not a parenting win, I don't know what is.
My daughter, in anger, told me that her grandma was her favorite person.
— Doc McMuffins (@Cynical_Parent) December 14, 2018
Frankly, that's the best news I've heard all day.
I'll be helping her pack her suitcase, if you need me.
My 4-year-old: Are we going to grandma's today?
— A Bearer Of Dad News (@HomeWithPeanut) April 2, 2022
Me: Tomorrow.
4: Yay, Grandma's today!
Me: No, tomorrow.
4: Today?
Me: [sigh] Sure, today.
4: Yay, Grandma's tomorrow!
If you haven’t manipulated your kids into calling grandma to ask to sleep over, you’re missing out on a crucial parenting hack.
— MomTransparenting (@momtransparent1) July 10, 2020
Us: [Unloading several dozen bags from our van]
— The Mom at Law® (@TheMomAtLaw) September 9, 2018
Neighbor: Wow. Did you guys just get back from vacation?
Us: No, just took the kids to grandma’s house for a couple of hours.
*dinner requests at grandmas*
— Chris (@GettingMyDadOn) December 28, 2019
6- Can I have a pancake?
Grandma- What did your dad say?
6- He said no.
Grandma- I'll make you three pancakes for dinner.
Daughter: Mom, where can I practice my recorder?
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) March 31, 2019
Me: *drives her over to Grandma’s house*
Starting this Easter morning off right by pumping my kids full of sugar before taking them to Grandma’s house. Let’s see how she likes it.
— Jennifer Parker (@Mrs_JParker) March 31, 2024
My niece: Grandma, why does your food always taste so good?
— Taco Biscuits (@bgschnikelfritz) June 11, 2022
My mom: Because it’s made with love
Me: ᴵ ᵈᵒⁿ’ᵗ ᵏⁿᵒʷ ˢᵒᵐᵉᵗᶦᵐᵉˢ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ’ˢ ᵃⁿᵍᵉʳ ᵗʰʳᵒʷⁿ ᶦⁿ
Literally spent months stressed my 2yo would be miserable when we left him with his grandma for a 3 day vacay but he’s apparently having the best time, sleeping through the night, eating all his meals, and hasn’t asked to call us once ????
— Lucy Huber (@clhubes) July 22, 2022
My mom as a grandma: Have some more ice cream and then let's go buy you all the new toys you could ever want
— The Dad (@thedad) April 2, 2021
My mom when she was raising me: If you need new socks you'll have to earn them with chore money, now finish your boiled celery strings
Me (5 minutes before picking up kids after long weekend away):???? I miss them so much.
— Doc McMuffins (@Cynical_Parent) March 4, 2018
Me (5 minutes into trip home from Grandma's): ???? $@#£, you're getting a vasectomy this week!
Chicken nuggets and carrots at grandma's for 4yo: delicious!
— Karen (@AntsyButterfly) June 12, 2018
Chicken nuggets and carrots at home for 4yo: I don't like this! Noooooo! I won't eat it! You ruined everything!
At my parents house and the other two grandkids are in bed asleep. My clever toddler manages to fight her bedtime (and me) an extra hour and gets herself a bonus popsicle and snuggles from her grandma. Well played little one. Well played. #momlife#toddlerlife#parenting
— Marissa ???????? (@michimama75) May 27, 2018
Grandma: The kids ate REALLY healthy today. Lots of fruit.
— The Salty Mamas (@saltymamas) August 10, 2017
Me: Fruit snacks aren't fruit.
Grandma: ...#momlife#grandma#norulesatgrandmas
2.5: Mommy if I tell you to do something you need to do it right away
— Some Boys' Mother (@someboysmother) September 26, 2019
Me: Oh is that so? Did you want to go to grandma's today?
2.5: Yeah!
Me: Let's do that right away.
[picking kids up from Grandma’s]
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) September 21, 2018
Me: Hi Kids! I’ve missed you! *holds out arms for hug*
Sacks of sugar: Hey. *continue watching T.V.*
Murphy’s Law of parenting and sleep:
— Momsense Ensues (@momsense_ensues) January 15, 2021
While staying with grandma, my children will sleep until 9:30am, but while at home with me when hubs is traveling, will wake up at 6am.
Starting to miss the kids after 3 days at grandma’s, so I put some syrup on my fingers and pressed them to the windows to make comfort handprints.
— SpacedMom (@copymama) August 9, 2018
If you guys need anything, just get my 6yo to ask her grandma for it.
— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) August 20, 2018
I have these headaches that, more often than not, go away to their grandma’s house.
— My Life As Dad (@milifeasdad) May 7, 2023
My 9 year old: Mom, what’s our billing zip code?
— ThisOneSays (@ThisOneSayz) November 17, 2022
Me: It’s…wait, what??
And that’s how I walked in on her hustling her grandma into signing up for a Netflix account. WE ALREADY HAVE ONE but I admire her dedication.
Mama: Time to go.
— Richard Dean (@dad_on_my_feet) July 5, 2019
3yo: No.
Mama: Yes.
3yo: No!
Mama: Yes.
3yo: NO!
Mama: *exasperated* TIME TO GO NOW!!
3yo: NO!!!!!!
Grandma: I’m going too.
3yo: Oh....ok then!
My 10 y/o daughter told me not to get her socks for Christmas because Grandma always gets them for her, so I asked her why and she said, “Grammy likes to tell me to put them on when I’m barefooted because I’m making her feet cold.”
— NicholasG (@Dad_At_Law) December 19, 2022
Me: Did you miss me while you were at Grandma’s house?
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) November 5, 2018
6-year-old: She let us make cookies.
Me: I missed you.
6: We ate them for breakfast.
So that’s a no.
