Office Hours With Dr. Crash

A lighthearted parody of competitive sailing as competitors are caught in their most embarrasing moments on the racecourse.

“Timing is everything,” the old proverb says, advising that success is related to the trigger of a certain chain of events. Be that as it may, as this relates to sailing fast and tippy boats, “Timing,” I would add, “is patience.” All sailors know the importance of a clear and audible countdown before anyone makes a break for the other side. We can think of “three, two, one” as our “ready, set, go.” When someone blitzes at “ready,” however, the outcome will inevitably be bad, as our careening catamaran crew can now affirm. Any good racing sailor will relate—it’s easy to get amped up in the heat of the moment, but next time, wait for the “go” before you go over the falls. —Dr. Crash