DEAR DEIDRE: A YEAR ago, my husband died. He was 50, as I am now.
I’d not felt up to clearing his things out before now but I’ve come across a letter someone sent us five years ago. It said my husband should tell me about his fling with his team leader at work.
I feel like our whole relationship was a lieGetty - Contributor
I was very upset but my husband said it was just an ex causing trouble. He had been staying late because their accounts were being audited. I believed him.
Now that letter has started me thinking again. I’ve asked a trusted mutual friend who worked with him whether he cheated on me and she said no, that he adored me.
But my trust has gone and there’s a deep rage inside me that keeps me awake every night.
I feel like I hate him and all those good memories were nothing but lies.
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DEIDRE SAYS: I am sure they weren’t lies. You are still grieving the loss of the man you love and that letter has offered a way out of feeling that pain.
If he were a cheat, you are thinking, you needn’t mourn.
Deep down, you know he was faithful. So throw out that letter and let yourself grieve.
You can find support from Cruse (cruse.org.uk, 0808 808 1677).
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