Woman, 30, who went through menopause at age 20 is crowdfunding her IVF as a last chance to have her dream baby
A WOMAN who went through the menopause aged 20 has launched a desperate bid to have her dream baby.
Jade Burns was devastated when she learned she’d be unable to conceive having been diagnosed with Premature Ovarian Failure (POF) six months after starting university.
The 30-year-old has since suffered two miscarriages after becoming pregnant via an egg donor and is no longer eligible for more IVF on the NHS in her area.
So in a last ditch attempt to start a family Jade and husband Jon Burns, 30, are hoping to raise the £9,000 needed to try again through crowdfunding.
Healthcare worker Jade, from Leigh-on-Sea, Essex, said: “I feel like this is our last chance. I always said I would try three times and that would be it.
“I’ve thought about what my baby will look like, what we will call them, what school they would go to and what colour we’d paint the nursery.
“I have a baby drawer with a little blanket and some clothes in it.
“We’ve called the babies we’ve lost our two little dots.
“I can’t see our lives without children in them. It’s not really an option.”
Having never had a period, Jade visited the GP at the age of 20 and after blood tests three weeks later was diagnosed with Premature Ovarian Failure just six months after starting university.
She had known engineer Jon since they were 13 and the pair became a couple a year after Jade’s diagnosis before getting married in October 2016.
WHAT IS PREMATURE OVARIAN FAILURE?
Premature ovarian failure can occur when a woman’s ovaries stop making normal levels of certain hormones, particularly the hormone oestrogen.
This can also be known as primary ovarian insufficiency.
It can run in families, especially if a relative went through menopause in their 20s or 30s.
The cause is often unknown but can be caused by:
- chromosome abnormalities such as Turner syndrome
- an autoimmune disease where the immune system starts attacking body tissues
- infections such as tuberculosis, mumps or malaria in rare cases
The pair had IVF and egg donor funding acknowledged in December 2016, two months after their wedding, and were matched with three donors between April and November 2017 but unfortunately these fell through.
However on November 10, 2017 they got a call to say they’d been matched with fourth donor. The couple had 13 embryos made – two of which were viable.
In April 2018 Jade had her first embryo implanted, but seven weeks later she miscarried.
Jade said: “I hadn’t really had any hot flushes, but I did have aches and fatigue – although I’d put that down to another health condition.
“About three weeks after I visited the GP, just before my 21st birthday, they told me I’d gone into early menopause.
“It was a shock. I’d never expected them to say that. I love children and always knew I’d want a family so it was extremely hard to comprehend.
“I started to worry about my future. I was single at the time and wondered if I’d ever meet anyone who would want to marry me if I couldn’t have children.
“You don’t feel like much of a woman. You feel like you’ve aged 30 years in the space of a couple of hours.
“Jon always knew about my diagnosis and that if we were to have children it would be through IVF and egg donation.
“By April 2018 they’d created my embryo and two days after my 30th birthday we had the transfer.
“After an agonising two week wait we got our first positive pregnancy test and were over the moon. We could see this little dot on the scan.
“It was going really well but then at five weeks I started bleeding. I had a reassurance scan and all seemed okay but a week later I went to the doctor because I’d been feeling sick and I started miscarrying in the doctor’s surgery. At seven weeks I miscarried.
“It was incredibly distressing. I went to the hospital and they gave me a cremation form and that was the worst moment. At that moment I realised what they were telling me.”
Three months later the couple tried again with the second embryo – but Jade miscarried again at six weeks pregnant, leaving her suffering from anxiety and depression at the time.
The couple are now desperate to try once more before considering other routes and are seeking help to raise the £9,000 required.
Although the National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE) recommends the NHS should fund women under 40 for three rounds of IVF, at the time Jade’s local Clinical Commissioning Group would only fund two rounds.
What are the signs and symptoms of menopause?
Menopause occurs when the body’s sex hormones change, and this occurs naturally as you age.
Your ovaries reduce the amount of oestrogen produced and will stop releasing an egg each month.
In the UK, the average age for a woman to go through menopause is 51.
Around one in 100 women experience menopause before the age of 40, and this is known as premature ovarian insufficiency or premature menopause.
There is no clear cause as to why early menopause happens before the age of 45.
Sometimes it can be triggered by surgeries such as some breast cancer treatments or when the ovaries are removed, or even from medical conditions such as Down’s syndrome.
The severity of menopausal symptoms can vary depending on the individual. They can range from mild to significantly interrupting your daily routine.
Menopausal symptoms can start months or years before your periods stop, and can last until four years or longer after your last period.
Symptoms include:
- Hot flushes
- Difficulty in sleeping
- Anxiety
- Low mood
- Night sweats
- Vaginal dryness or discomfort during sex
- Reduced libido (sex drive)
- Problems with concentration or memory
If your menopausal symptoms are causing you discomfort or occur before the age of 45, your GP may be able to help.
Jade said: “When we found out I was pregnant the second time we felt more apprehensive. We’d told a lot of people the first time but kept it to ourselves the second time for fear of jinxing it.
“The second time was probably more difficult because I really felt like that was it – that was our last chance and that it was the end of our family.
“But I’ve not lost hope. We’ve always thought we would try three times before considering other options such as surrogacy and adoption.
“Asking for money is not what we wanted to do, but we see crowdfunding as a way of raising awareness of miscarriage, mental health and fertility.
“Miscarriage happens to one in four women. I don’t feel there is a lot of support offered to help them deal with the mental and physical impact. It isn’t really spoken about and that’s something that needs to change.
“I also want to raise awareness of early menopause as this is still a taboo subject. One in 10,000 women under 20 experience early menopause and it affects five per cent of women under 40.”
To donate visit https://www.justgiving.com/crowdfunding/jadejonivf.
Jade has also set up an Instagram page to help raise awareness of fertility and baby loss.
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Sun columnist Lorraine Kelly launched her M word campaign to break taboos around menopause.
She explained that menopause is not a punchline to a joke — and needs to be taken more seriously.
And Michelle Heaton described going through it as “like a burning fire inside me, an uncontrollable rage”.