The 13 tattoos everyone has but nobody should
EVERYONE makes mistakes in life. We wouldn’t be able to learn and grow as people if we didn’t make them.
However, marking yourself with a permanent tattoo is a mistake that will follow you around for life and let’s face it… You’ve learnt nothing from it.
They may have been the greatest idea in the world at the time, but a few years on, you’re wondering what the hell you were thinking.
Here are the top 13 tattoo trends that should have never existed.
1 – Tribal
One of the most popular tattoo trends of all time. Lads and lasses in the ‘90s and early ‘00s wanted to look like a tribal warrior with ripped muscles and long flowing hair. Cut to reality and that tribal tattoo has stretched out a fair bit as the diet took a turn for the worst post 30th birthday.
You should have just bought the fake sleeve tribal tattoos mate.
2 – Tramp stamp
Ah, the crest of the classy girl. Positioned just on the lower back, the Tramp Stamp varied in style but never varied in quality. I’m struggling to think how anyone thought it was a good idea in the first place, but I’m pretty sure no-one has requested a Tramp Stamp since at least 2008… Well, I hope not.
3 – Barbed wire
Do you feel like you’re a proper hardman but no-one is giving you the respect you deserve? Well, do I have the crap tattoo for you! A bit of barbed wire around those bulging biceps will demand immediate respect.
Alternatively, for the ladies, you can get a barbed wire around your upper thigh to show that you shouldn’t be messed with. I’d recommend intertwining it with a rose to show that you also have a soft side… Or just don’t get it at all.
4 – Inspirational quote tattoos
Yes, I know that it probably sounded incredible at 3am during a drunken conversation with your mates, but getting “Just Believe”on your wrist is never a good idea.
5 – Ankle tattoos
The fact that you’ve hidden them down on your ankles probably means that it wasn’t the most confident of tattoo choices in the first place, was it? Now, every time you hit the beach you’ll be greeted with those flowers and lines that looked so lovely on the tattoo parlour wall.
6 – Partner names
In an ideal world, every great relationship will last forever, but I’m afraid life just doesn’t work that way. It might be the most romantic gesture ever when you’re 17, promising that your love will never die and you’ll be forever together. Fast forward five years and you’re Facebook stalking them whilst they’re on holiday in Crete with their new partner.
7 – Asian writing
Unless you speak the language fluently, I’d steer clear of this all together. You’ll most likely find that the Mandarin writing on your arm doesn’t mean “Forever in my heart,” it actually means “Insert inspirational quote.”
8 – Harry Potter
Nobody cares how much you love the books or films, getting a tattoo of Dumbledore on your leg is the ‘00s version of having a Game of Thrones Jon Snow tattoo. Try explaining who the hell Hagrid is to your grandchildren in 40 years’ time.
9 – Football team tattoos
Yes, we know you support them and yes, I’m sure you’re Tottenham till you die, but did you really have to get it stamped on your head? What if the interview for your dream job is with an Arsenal fan?
Also club crests change so often these days that you’ll be out of date in months.
10 – Bow-tie tattoos
Instead of getting a bow-tie tattoo to show people that you’re artistic and creative, why don’t you just do things that are artistic and creative?
11 – Yin Yang
OK, we get it. You went backpacking in Asia and you’ve totally found yourself. Congratulations.
12 – Stars – Emo
Perhaps the most popular tattoo that gets removed in the present day. You may have been going through that strong Emo phase, but that’s long gone now and so are the My Chemical Romance CDs. The tattoo should probably go too, right?
13 – Full neck tattoo
Once you’ve decided on a full neck tattoo, there’s no going back. I know you want to show how much of a badass you are, but there must be alternatives that still make you employable? Maybe park on the double yellow lines?
Have you had any of these tattoos or know someone else who has? Let us know in the comments.