This is how often most people are having sex & how to make sure you’re hitting the mark
PEOPLE always wonder how much sex is enough sex and how long it should last. There are a whole host of factors that impact our sex lives or lack of, including age, health, sex drive and lifestyle. It’s normal to feel intrigued about how often most people are having sex – and wonder how to […]
PEOPLE always wonder how much sex is enough sex and how long it should last.
There are a whole host of factors that impact our sex lives or lack of, including age, health, sex drive and lifestyle.
It’s normal to feel intrigued about how often most people are having sex – and wonder how to boost the amount of sex you’re having if you don’t think it’s enough.
But now Hot Octopuss has gone and worked out how much sex people – whether they’re single, in a relationship or married, are having.
The recent survey generated from London based Global sex tech pioneers Hot Octopuss found that on average, people are having partnered sex once a week.
The live data – which has 758 responses so far – has findings that aren’t that surprising.
For example, 50% of people are having partnered sex about once a week or more while people in a relationship are having sex more often with 38% having sex every few days.
However single people are having much less partnered sex.
The survey found that 29% of single people are not generally sexually active with partners, with once a fortnight being the second most popular answer at 15%.
But if you’re married, the highest result is that 29% of married couples are having sex once a week.
This may seem less than people in a relationship but it’s in line with the wider survey results.
Julia Margo, co-founder of Hot Octopuss, revealed why these survey results are the way they are.
She said: “You are more likely to be having regular sex if you are in a relationship or married. The likely answer is opportunity.
“If you are in an early-stage relationship (the people who have sex most) you’ll be bonking more often – it’s just the way it goes!”.
“This side of your relationship may get less regular when married as things become less exciting, but you’ve still got more day-to-day opportunities than someone who’s single.”
Elsewhere Ruby Payne, Sex and Relationships expert at UberKinky said every couple is different and people shouldn’t compare their sex life to others.
She explained every relationship dynamic differs and what’s normal for one couple may be tame for another, and the average time can range from once a week to once a month.
She added: “People in new relationships are likely to have a higher number than average – that good old honeymoon period – but when the sparkle wears off, it’s totally normal to settle into a routine.
“Married couples will have well and truly found their groove, but there are so many factors that affect this ‘average’.
“So rather than comparing yourself to others, figure out what works for the both of you.”
It’s not unusual for your partner’s sex drive to play hide-and-seek. But don’t worry, there’s some great ways to get your partner in the mood if they’re always saying no to sex.
Whether they’re too tired, have a lot of stress at work or are just not feeling up to it, there’s some tips and tricks you can try to spice things up in the bedroom.
Julia Margo said the Hot Octopuss survey found that touching your partner sensually received the highest result – with 26% of people admitting that it works.
While kissing was the second most popular vote.
Julia commented: “There were some great survey answers on how to get your partner in the mood.
“One person revealed they have a cocktail, watch something together and the build up results in sex.
“While another person admitted they drop hints to each other, give compliments and do light touching – which often works for them.”
This might not sound ultra sexy, but knowing that you’ve got a ‘sex date’ pencilled in for the end of the week can get you both excited before it’s even come around.
Meanwhile Carly Smith, Sexual Health Expert at Condoms.uk agreed that it’s not unusual for life to get in the way – and sometimes sex with your partner doesn’t always feel like it should be a priority.
But she said this is where people go wrong, and if your partner seems uninterested in sex then it’s time to change things up a bit.
Carly encouraged: “Get out of the routine and make them feel special. Surprise them with something and make them feel wanted.
“It’s so easy to fall into the same routine, but when this happens, it’s important to get out of it as soon as possible. And if you’re both super busy for the week, then schedule in some alone time.
“This might not sound ultra sexy, but knowing that you’ve got a ‘sex date’ pencilled in for the end of the week can get you both excited before it’s even come around.
“Don’t rush it though, just enjoy your time with your partner when the time comes.”
The Hot Octopuss survey also provided some great tips on how to meet someone if you’re single. The most popular answer was through friends followed by apps like Tinder.
Some people that took part in the survey shared their top tips.
One person encouraged: “Don’t look, be relaxed and do think that you are interested in and meet people that are interested in the same things.”
While another suggested: “Social groups, recreational sport leagues, volunteering.
“These offer loads of social interaction, united under a common goal/cause, from people of all walks of life. Meeting someone at places like this lightens the expectation and pressure.”
While a third added: “Be open and flirtatious, also don’t be afraid to be specific about what you’re looking for.”
Meanwhile Ruby Payne said there’s plenty of ways to meet new people – but the number-one way is through apps.
She said: “You have your standard ones like Tinder, Bumble and Grindr, but there are plenty out there for no-strings-attached sex – like PURE – or for more specific interests – Feeld is perfect for threesomes.
“If apps aren’t your thing, then opt for word-of-mouth recommendations instead.
“Your friends are the best people to talk you up to others, so ask if they know anyone else who’s single and to set you up on a date.
“You never know, you may find the love of your life through a single degree of separation.”
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