The signs to tell if your child was ADHD like Love Island’s Jacques
AFTER quitting the Love Island villa, Jacques O’Neill, 23, opened up about how ADHD left him feeling anxious.
Now three women tell Claire O’Reilly and Vanessa Chalmers how their later-life diagnoses finally helped them to better understand themselves.
IF you hear the phrase ADHD, what comes to mind?
If it’s a cheeky child who won’t sit still, chances are you’re not the only one thinking that.
“When people think about ADHD, they often think of children getting diagnosed,” special educational needs tutor Georgina Durrant tells Sun Health.
“But there are lots of adults whose ADHD wasn’t picked up in school, who are now getting diagnosed as they get older.
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“Women and girls with ADHD in my experience are even less likely to be diagnosed than boys.
“Boys often tick the boxes of traditional presentation whereas girls can present with inattentiveness, which may be easier to miss.”
Of the 2.6million Brits estimated to live with the condition, 1.8million are adults, while 785,000 are children, according to the charity ADHD UK.
It’s a stereotype that was challenged on ITV2’s Love Island earlier this month, when it emerged 23-year-old Jacques O’Neill lives with the condition.
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And he’s not alone. Stars Will.i.am, Emma Watson, Justin Timberlake and Paris Hilton have all been diagnosed.
Jacques dramatically quit the Majorca villa after love interest Adam Collard made moves on his partner Paige.
The rugby player emotionally told Welsh paramedic Paige: “I just know for us to work I need us to get back to myself and the only way I’m going to get back to myself is by going home.”
The dramatic exit came after his family pleaded with viewers to “be kind” after some branded his behaviour during a row with Paige “rude and disrespectful”.
Jacques’ sister, Karen, who ran his Instagram account while he was on the show, revealed her brother was diagnosed when he was nine.
“By no means is this a get-out clause for his actions but it is to show that he can fundamentally struggle with his emotions at times,” she wrote alongside a screenshot of mental health website PsychCentral explaining how ADHD sufferers can appear “rude”.
The post said: “These behaviours can stem from challenges with self-control, executive functioning and self-stimulating actions.
“If you start to look at things from their perspective, you may see that it’s not so rude after all.”
Feeling anxious
Rachel Vora, a psychotherapist and founder of CYP Wellbeing, adds: “ADHD is often misunderstood as a condition where someone is simply very ‘energetic’ but there are aspects of it that are more challenging to identify.
“A patient once defined their ADHD as ‘feeling constantly overwhelmed with thoughts’, which highlights one of the psychological traits we don’t often see.”
After arriving back home, Jacques told The Sun in an exclusive interview: “Any little thing in the villa, in the end, started bothering me and I was just getting in so much of a rut.
“I know the way I spoke to Paige was wrong. I tried to apologise and she kept asking why I did it.
“ADHD isn’t just about not being able to concentrate. It’s also about feeling anxious quite a lot, being on edge a lot.”
Since leaving the villa, Jacques says he has been inundated with messages of support, adding: “The amount of grown men who have messaged me saying I’m their inspiration is overwhelming.”
Awareness changed my life
WHEN Sarah Sharp was 11, teachers told her mum that if she did not change her attitude to learning she would amount to nothing.
Sarah, 36, says: “All through primary school, my reports said the same thing – I didn’t pay attention, talked too much, rushed my work and my handwriting was atrocious.
After spending her twenties job- hopping, She enrolled at uni, aged 30, and was diagnosed with dyslexia.
But it wasn’t until her daughter Freya, then 14, was diagnosed with ADHD in lockdown that Sarah “put two and two together”.
Reading Freya’s school report, the mum-of-four from Eastbourne was reduced to tears.
“It was a real lightbulb moment,” she says. “It felt like her entire report was talking about me.
It said, ‘Freya is very disorganised and has a short attention span.’ It really hit home.
In all areas of my life, whether trying to get the laundry organised or completing work tasks, I just get distracted.”
I finally felt I could make sense of my life.
Sarah Sharp
Sarah, who is CEO of TicTock therapy (tictocktherapy.co.uk), which supports people with tics and Tourette’s syndrome, adds: “Freya’s school report said she can start tasks but leave them half-done.
“This was another moment of realisation. I’ve got hundreds of projects but lots remain unfinished.
“Freya discussed that she cannot sit still, is restless and often talkative. Sometimes she cannot stop talking.”
“This is a big one for me – I can go from calm to 100 miles an hour in seconds.
“When I was younger, my dad would comment on how I never stopped talking and asked me to sit still because I fidgeted so much.”
Sarah with Freya, sought help – and two months after reading Freya’s report, in August, she was diagnosed with ADHD combined type.
“I finally felt I could make sense of my life,” she says.
Harrison 15, and Hayden, 11 – two of Sarah’s other three children – have been diagnosed with ADHD too.
Sarah’s youngest daughter Mya, four, is awaiting a diagnosis.
Sarah now takes medication to control her symptoms.
“I struggled emotionally and I’d often get overwhelmed by the smallest things, which would cause me to have a meltdown – breaking down in tears.
“Since being diagnosed, everything has changed. I understand myself more and I’m open about my ADHD.
“Medication has changed my life. I still struggle but I’m able to put a little calm into my chaotic mind.”
How to tell if you have ADHD as a grown-up...
WHILE you can only be diagnosed with ADHD by a doctor, it doesn’t hurt to be armed with some knowledge to start that conversation with your GP.
Experts believe that the condition does not just develop in adulthood, but rather that you will have lived with it since you were a child.
However, the ways in which the symptoms can present can change as you get older.
The NHS states: “For example, hyperactivity tends to decrease in adults, while inattentiveness tends to remain as the pressures of adult life increase.
“Adult symptoms also tend to be far more subtle than childhood symptoms.”
The NHS lists the following list of symptoms of ADHD in adults:
- Carelessness and lack of attention to detail
- Always starting new tasks before finishing old ones
- Poor organisational skills
- Inability to focus or prioritise
- Continually losing or misplacing things
- Forgetfulness
- Restlessness and edginess
- Difficulty keeping quiet, and speaking out of turn
- Blurting out responses and often interrupting others
- Mood swings, irritability and a quick temper
- Inability to deal with stress
- Extreme impatience
- Taking risks during activities, often with little or no regard for personal safety or the safety of others – for example, driving dangerously.
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And if your child is showing signs...
THE symptoms in children are better defined, and tend to show before a child reaches six years old.
The key is if they occur in more than one social setting – in the home and at school, for example.
Signs can be divided into two categories: Inattentiveness – think difficulty concentrating and focusing – and hyperactivity and impulsiveness.
The main signs of inattentiveness include:
- Short attention span and easily distracted
- Makes careless mistakes
- Appearing forgetful or losing things
- Unable to stick to tasks that are boring or time-consuming
- Unable to listen to or carry out instructions
- Constantly changing task or activity
- Difficulty organising tasks
The main signs of hyperactivity are:
- Unable to sit still, especially in calm, quiet surroundings
- Constantly fidgeting
- Unable to concentrate on tasks
- Excessive physical movement
- Excessive talking
- Unable to wait their turn
- Acting without thinking
- Interrupting conversations
- Little or no sense of danger
If you spot any of these signs in your child, it is worth contacting your GP to discuss the possibility it could be ADHD.