My partner said we’re more like friends – but he makes no effort

DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN my partner told me he didn’t love me any more I thought that was him saying we both needed to put in some more effort.

So why now am I the only one trying to make this relationship work?

I’m 32, he’s 35. We’re due to get married next summer after six years together.

Last month, I woke up to find him pacing the room.

When I asked what was wrong, he said we were more like friends than lovers.

He’s not wrong – with the stress of the wedding, there hasn’t been much romance and we haven’t had sex in months.

So I’ve been trying to spice things up.

I’ve cooked him romantic meals, bought new lingerie and organised fun date nights. But he’s done nothing.

I need him to meet me halfway.

DEIDRE SAYS: The good thing is, he has started to speak to you.

But now you do need to ask him if he wants to try and turn things around.

If he says he does then let him know you need to see him putting some effort into it too.

But I’m afraid there is very little you can do if he’s clear that he wants to end things.

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It might also help to have couples counselling, where an expert can help you to work through these issues.

Find a counsellor at tavistockrelationships.org or call 020 7380 1960.