I’m worried my friend is being controlled

DEAR DEIDRE: I’ve made a new friend at church but her mother seems to completely control her.

I’m a single mum with a little boy of two. At our church, there’s a weekly group meeting where people share coffee, snacks and friendship.

Other young parents go but recently I’ve been talking to a lovely woman who is around my age, 31.

She goes with her mother, who seems like a right piece of work.
Her mum even tells her where to sit, how to sit and what to eat.

The daughter told me she used to work part-time but her mother made her give it up and now she claims benefits.

Last week the daughter came on her own to the group and I invited her back to my home for a cuppa. But she only stayed for half an hour, saying her mother wanted her home.

Her mother looks around 60. It worries me that my friend can’t have a life of her own. How can I help her?

DEIDRE SAYS: Get to know her further, to make a true assessment of the situation.

Listen to her and, if she mentions her mother and the negative side of their relationship, explain to her that you are concerned.

Assure her there is help available. Despite them not being a couple, she can find help through The National Domestic Abuse Helpline (nationaldahelpline.org.uk, 0808 2000 247).

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