Friends complimented my weight loss until they found out I was dieting… then hurl insults, even though I was obese
TWENTY years ago, you’d probably never heard of the phrase “diet culture” – and calorie counting wasn’t thought “toxic”, it was fun.
Fat-shaming TV shows like You Are What You Eat and The Biggest Loser UK had millions of viewers, while gossip mags were plastered with images of celebs’ so-called bikini bodies, scrutinised for signs of weight gain.
Thankfully, we have come a long way since the days of dangerous dieting crazes and size-zero models. Now, gyms promote the mental health benefits of fitness rather than how many calories you can burn on the treadmill.
But what happens when you genuinely do want to burn calories and, whisper it, shed pounds? Where can you turn? With phrases like “intuitive eating” and “mindful movement” the current buzzwords, wanting to slim can feel like a dirty little secret.
That was the case for Jennifer George, from Berkshire, who began a weight-loss drive in 2018.
Jennifer, now 30, says: “The turning point came after I went to a friend’s baby shower. I saw a picture someone had taken of me with the mum-to-be and I looked huge. I was mortified.”
People asked, ‘Are you unhappy?’
Jennifer, who’s 5ft 6in, weighed 15st 2lb and was a size 16. With a BMI of 34.2, she was, according to the NHS calculator, obese. So she joined a well-known weight-loss club, following their diet plans and attending weekly weigh-ins. But she didn’t tell a soul.
“As the pounds started to drop off, friends would tell me how great I looked. I was constantly on the receiving end of lovely compliments.”
But if she uttered the D-word, she soon felt judged. Jennifer, now mum to ten-month-old Luna and currently on maternity leave from her job as a recruiter, says: “When I announced I was following a diet and paying to attend a weight-loss group, the compliments suddenly stopped.
“I quickly discovered it’s a no-no to even talk about dieting, let alone tell people you’re on a diet.
“People would ask, ‘Are you unhappy?’ and, ‘What are you dieting for?’
“I was plainly overweight, yet they didn’t see a problem with it.”
Traditional dieting groups have fallen out of favour in recent years.
In 2023, WeightWatchers decided to stop selling its products on the website, then in February this year its stock value fell 25 per cent after Oprah Winfrey announced she’d be quitting the board, revealing she had used a weight-loss drug.
Another global diet brand, Jenny Craig, collapsed in Australia and New Zealand last year after 40 years’ trading, while meal-replacement firm SlimFast saw sales sink by 17 per cent. Now, beleaguered diet
firms are trying to claw back custom, with the rise of weight-loss drugs thought to be behind companies like WeightWatchers trying to cater to people after a quick fix.
It recently bought Sequence, a telehealth firm which allows patients to obtain virtual prescriptions for the new weight-loss medication.
Sima Sistani, CEO of WeightWatchers, told business magazine Fortune: “We’re admitting we’re learning, that science has evolved and therefore we should as well.”
The irony is, I met my husband when I was 15st and he prefers me curvier.
But stats suggest the decline in dieting is also down to attitudes. Hashtag #bodypositive has almost 20million Instagram posts, and the global plus-size fashion market is worth about £228billion.
Jennifer believes this “body positive” movement may have triggered the negativity about her dieting.
“At social occasions I’d brace myself for the inevitable insults,” she says. “I would hear things like, ‘Oh, look, you’ve lost even more weight!’ They would even question my relationship, saying hurtful things like, ‘Is your husband behind this?’
“The irony is, I met my husband when I was 15st and he prefers me curvier.”
But she is not alone in feeling attacked for slimming. Singers Adele and Lizzo have been labelled “traitors” for losing weight.
In 2020, reality TV’s Scarlett Moffatt admitted she deliberately gained weight to discourage fans from buying her fitness DVD, after it was revealed her 3st weight loss was the result of a 700-calorie a day diet and bootcamp rather than simply a healthy-eating and exercise programme.
Jennifer, who left her slimming club after losing 3st, admits some aspects of the diet industry don’t sit well with her.
“I was losing weight, but very slowly. Was that deliberate, so I would keep going back? I also didn’t like standing on the scales in front of everyone else.”
Jennifer, now size 12, welcomes the body-positive movement.
The thinking is I should embrace my bigger figure.
“It’s fantastic a bikini body now means a woman of any size or shape wearing a bikini,” she says. But she admits there are drawbacks. “If people don’t want to lose weight, that’s fine, but it means no room for people like me who do want to slim,” she says. “The thinking is I should embrace my bigger figure.”
Jenny puts her former weight gain down to using food as an emotional crutch. “Ever since I was a child I have always been heavier,” she says.
“My weight peaked in my mid-twenties, when I used food as a comfort.
“I worked long hours as an estate agent and when I got stressed I reached for food.
“Then, when I got into a relationship, we were having calorific meals out together and I was eating larger portions.”
Today Jenny refuses to weigh herself regularly and has no scales at home. The last time she checked she was between 11 and 12st.
As for those who think she should not diet, she has news for them.
“I’d like to lose a little bit more weight,” she says.
“I’ll be happy when I am half a stone lighter, I am dieting to achieve that.
“When I look in the mirror, I still feel chubby around my thighs and arms — sometimes I think I’m still that bigger person at the baby shower.
“My brain has taken time to catch up with how I look.
“Friends trying to lose weight often message me for tips.
“But it’s done one-to-one, on the down-low, we can’t talk about it.”