I married 60 ‘loves of my life’ – we stood in a ‘circle of togetherness’ and had ‘bead-bearers’ instead of wedding rings
WHILE some people may be focused on finding “the one,” an Australian bride chose her top 60.
After tying the knot with the entire group, the woman shared an insight into her one-of-a-kind wedding celebrations.
Carly Sare, who works as a wedding photographer, shared vows, rituals, dances, and blessings with the 60 “loves of her life” at the three-day ceremony.
The colorful weekend saw the 40-year-old and dozens of her friends celebrate their platonic love.
“As a wedding photographer, I spend my life at weddings, and I’ve noticed that in a culture that is rather barren for rituals, weddings are a place where they abound,” she explained.
She pointed out that weddings are one of the few occasions that see lifelong friends and family make an effort to celebrate together.
“We know how to show up for weddings, we travel, take time off work, and dress up,” Carly said.
“When you gather a bunch of people, and look at something with a shared intention, something powerful happens.”
She described the feeling as a sort of “legal binding alchemy” that “galvanizes things and changes their color in the most beautiful way.”
Despite wanting to experience this magical day with her loved ones, Carly wasn’t sure if a traditional marriage was for her.
“I used to have some icks around marriage,” she explained.
“When the marriage equality laws came through those icks got quieter, and I realized I’m not against marriage. I just felt funny about the way we prioritize some loves over others.”
She wasn’t sold on the idea of exclusively prioritizing romantic-monogamous love.
“For me, many of the greatest loves of my life, my great partnerships, have turned out to be my dear friends,” Carly revealed.
She decided to pledge her deep commitment and respect to these “deep, enduring loves.”
The festivities included traditional wedding rituals such as vows, toasts, speeches, a long table dinner, a ceremony, official photos, and dancing.
However, Carly also strayed from the norm when it came to the dress code, opting for a “colorful, fabulous, abundant” dress and encouraging her “brooms” to do the same.
During the ceremony, the group stood in a “circle of togetherness” as they held hands and recited vows to each other.
One such vow simply stated: “I feel safe when you are around, I feel joy when you are around.
The ceremony was stunning, heart-wrenching, playful, colorful, and fun.
Carly Sare
“I have room for us to make mistakes, and I have room for us to repair.”
The group also recited: “Marriage, according to the law of the universe, is the union between an ecosystem of people with the inclusion of suitable others, voluntarily entered into for life.”
Another unique take on a wedding day was the ring alternative.
Instead of wedding bands, two “bead-bearers” went around the circle offering beads from a bowl.”
These were blessed, threaded onto a necklace, and ceremoniously placed around Carly’s neck to represent their shared commitments.
“The ceremony was stunning, heart-wrenching, playful, colorful, and fun,” Carly recalled.
“It was absolute heaven and marrying my friends was the best decision of my life.
“I now feel more full and grounded than I’ve ever felt in my life.”
She described her new self as “blissful, open, abundant, secure, expansive, and more available to the world and to life than ever before.”
“I felt safe and free all at once. Like we alchemized something magical,” she concluded.
Carly has now extended her photography services to help others who wish to hold a similar ceremony with their friends.