I became a proud trad wife at 22 – trolls say I’m ‘pathetic’ & ‘don’t have a brain’ but this is my dream life
A ‘TRAD wife’ whose typical day revolves around cooking, cleaning, and taking care of the kids, shared how she’s constantly told by online trolls she doesn’t have a brain.
Victoria Yost is a self-proclaimed trad wife, having quit her job to take on all stereotypical gender roles, she is entirely responsible for the household chores including all cleaning and cooking as well as the family‘s childcare needs 24/7.
Despite what may appear to be a backwards thinking approach to a modern family, Victoria explains, this does not mean she’s ‘stupid’ like many haters online insist she is.
The 30-year-old explained that trolls have constantly commented on her posts telling her that she would suffer without her husband due to her being ‘too stupid to take care of everything her husband does.’
She said: “Just because I’m a traditional wife doesn’t mean I no longer have a brain and I don’t have reasonable ability.
“I can still do a lot of good, and I believe we all can still do good.
“I’m a self-published author. I run my social media accounts. It’s a lot of fun.”
The mum from Frederick, Maryland, USA, embraced the homemaker lifestyle eight years ago after leaving her job as a skincare professional.
After having her first child, Victoria decided to be a stay-at-home mum which naturally developed into the traditional life she now leads, something she explained she is incredibly grateful for.
In her marriage, the content creator opted for the domestic roles, allowing her husband to take charge of the financial side of life.
However, she insists that her daily chores are just as demanding as any paid job.
Her day starts at 6am and is filled with childcare, housework, and creating content for her social media followers.
Victoria admitted that she gets a lot of hate online stating that she’s ‘pathetic for letting her husband take the lead role’, stating that ‘doing this will leave her in a bad position if he was no longer able to provide for the family’.
She explains that haters believe she is ’empty headed for letting motherhood become a personality trait’, claiming that she ‘must not have a brain’ if this is all she is capable of doing.
However, she disregards the messages, knowing she and her husband are clear on their dynamic and that she is more than capable of taking on any responsibilities having ensured the couple have a plan in place if something was to stop her husband from working.
What is a trad wife?
A trad wife (short for traditional wife) is a woman who chooses to take on an ultra traditional role in marriage, meaning she makes dinner and looks pretty whilst her husband goes to work.
The trend takes inspiration from the idea of a 1950s housewife.
Many ‘trad wives’ choose to dress in the style of clothing popular in this period (think floral dresses and frumpy cardigans).
Additionally, the values considered important to trad wives are similar to strict Christian values.
Trad wives believed they were not forced into this way of life, and that it was their purpose to be homemakers.
The trend, which has garnered attention on social media platforms such as TikTok and Instagram, glamorises a time gone by with little acknowledgement of the economic challenges facing families and mothers today.
She said: “I believe our world is so diverse and that we are so blessed right now to be living in a time where we have a choice. It has always been my choice to stay at home. It was always my long-term goal.
“My favourite part about being a homemaker is the flexibility we have. I’m always able to help out other people in different ways.
“I also am very much enjoying this season of motherhood and having the privilege of not having to miss a moment of it.
People have insinuated that I’m stupid, that I’m dumb
Victoria Yost
“We have set up fail safes in the event my husband cannot work. We have investments we can cash out if need be and insurances.
“I also still maintain licensure in the field I used to work in just in case I need to go back to work.
“What I tried to do online is I just tried to be encouraging, motivating and inspiring because being a stay-at-home caregiver can sometimes be very lonely.
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“So now that we have the internet and social media, we can form a community and we can support each other.”
Victoria explained that haters can be incredibly nasty towards her, as she added: “People have insinuated that I’m stupid, that I’m dumb.
“They’ve sent me some of the worst messages you could ever even think of, wishing me ill health, wishing my family ill health. It’s kind of ridiculous.
“People have also said it’s pathetic to be a stay-at-home mum because we shouldn’t allow motherhood to become our personalities, which that statement usually comes from people who don’t have children and don’t know just how much your life changes once a child is born.
“People assume that my husband and I haven’t made plans for the event that something happens to him, and he is no longer able to provide financially, so for that assumption, they suggest I’m dumb or lacking a brain. But it couldn’t be further from the truth!
“It’s just a choice and I think it’s beautiful that we have that choice nowadays.”
