I’m worried sick about the impact my mother’s drinking is having on my dad

DEAR DEIDRE: MY mother’s drinking is out of control, and I’m worried sick about the impact it’s having on my dad.

There isn’t a day that passes where she hasn’t drunk herself into a state, and I’m at a complete loss of what to do to help.

I’m 30, my mum is 65, and my dad is 72.

While my mum has always had a complicated relationship with alcohol, over the last few years it’s grown into a real problem.

Whether she’s at work, out with friends, or just watching TV at home, she’s constantly under the influence.

The worst part is that my dad is taking the brunt of it. Most days he’s having to look after her and put her to bed because she’s got herself into such a state.

He tries to hide it, but I can tell it’s taking a toll on him. It doesn’t help that she speaks so nastily to him too.

I’m so worried. How can I help them?

DEIDRE SAYS: Unfortunately, the only person who can make a change and stop the drinking is your mother.

Try to catch her in a more sober state and tell her how worried you are and that you want to help her.

My support pack, Dealing With A Problem Drinker, explains how to have this conversation and where your mum can go for help, if she agrees to.

In the meantime, let your dad know you’re there for him, but make it clear he can lean on you.

Contact Adfam (adfam.org.uk), which supports families of people who have alcohol issues.