Hezbollah asks U.S. for advice on how to govern with a dead leader

BERUIT — Following the death of their leader Hassan Nasrallah, members of the militant group Hezbollah asked the U.S. for advice on how to govern with a dead leader.

“Following the demise of our great ruler Nasrallah at the hands of those Israeli pigs, we here at Hezbollah need to know how to run our organization with a dead leader,” Omar Ibadi told the press. “We have reached out to leaders in the United States to ask how they can govern their own people with a dead president still in office.”

U.S. officials say Ibadi has been sending texts to high-ranking members of President Biden’s cabinet for guidance on how to run a large organization of people and govern many different groups even while the leader is deceased.