Secret Service To Save Millions By Protecting President With Thoughts And Prayers Instead

The Secret Service has announced it will no longer be complaining about its budget being inadequate to protect President Trump and his large entourage.

This came after as they discovered an equally effective means to keep him from harm at a fraction of the cost.

"Really the credit should go to Paul Ryan who gave us the idea."

Instead of trained agents following President Trump on his many expensive trips, they will now concentrate on protecting him from potential assailants using thoughts and prayers.