Upstart social networks may fall on their face

In the years since Facebook grew from being a digital college yearbook to a global octopus of connectivity, the only thing as reliable as the service’s ubiquity was the avalanche of stories about how the service was on its way out.

First there’s Ello, which made a big splash on its official premiere about a month ago and has been putting out fires ever since.

A manifesto is always a sign that users should approach a site with not just a grain of salt but a clove of garlic and a wooden stake.

When you log on to Ello for the first time (and the second time, and the third time, and the fourth time, if you haven’t given up by then), it directs you to follow a list of graphic designer dudes whom you don’t know and wouldn’t necessarily want to sit next to at the artisan coffee shop.

The more popular your content is, the more money you make, so it helps to already be a YouTube celebrity or at least a C-list Hollywood star.

The site’s FAQs are rife with mentions of embedded payment platforms and network adoption; the average person considering whether Tsu is the best place to brag about her engagement isn’t likely to feel at home.

[...] I fear that the complicated structure of the network’s monetization model — and the fact that in some ways, it resembles a pyramid scheme, with greater rewards accruing to those who monetize first — will spook potential users.

Challenged by the headaches of trying to find my friends on Ello and figure out how, exactly, I might be taken for a ride on Tsu, I closed both of the sites and logged on to Facebook.