How can I stop my troublesome son from living with my father?

DEAR DEIDRE: I’M a dad of 51 and my eldest son is 31. He’s had over a decade of drink and drug problems and because my youngest daughter has a severe disability, I threw him out.

Friends of his kept knocking on the door demanding money. He left and got a place in a hostel.

I’ve now found out that he is living with my dad – and my sister organised it.

She and I do not get along. My sister has always been a princess. She’s 45 and gets cross if I’m late sending a birthday card to one of her kids.

My son returned last week with my sister in tow. He let her do all the talking.

She said that he’d moved in with my father, who is 76 and not in great health, because she couldn’t bear to think of her nephew “living with addicts”.

I’m so angry. Why didn’t she call me? 

I’d have spelled out how it really is. Now my dad has been landed with all my son’s problems.

DEIDRE SAYS: This isn’t fair on your father and your son needs to be responsible for his own situation.

Although your son gives you concern, your father is not in good health. Talk to your dad about your worries and suggest that your son moves back to the hostel.

You can find support through We  Are With You (wearewithyou.org.uk), a charity helping any addict as well as friends and family.

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