Новости за 29.08.2015

If, lately, you’ve felt the urge to toss your cell phone and laptop into the raging sea—or, like Our Lady Rihanna, just shoot the damned things—we may have the perfect job for you. Catalonian sanctuary Our Lady of the Rock is accepting applications for a resident hermit.

On August 28, 2015, maverick fangirl Sarah Palin engaged fuzzy meat wad Donald Trump in what was billed as an interview. The two great patriots in fact stroked one another’s plainly suffering egos for 11 minutes. Journalism at its finest, folks.

On July 30, 23-year old Meenakshi Kumari and her 15-year-old sister were sentenced to be gang-raped by a group of village elders in the Baghpat district. The sisters weren’t convicted of any crimes, rather their sentence was punishment for their brother’s elopement. Vice reports:

I was 16 years old, a senior in high school, when Katrina devastated New Orleans. Like most teens my age, my biggest concern was what I was wearing to the weekend football game, or who was going to be my prom date. Who knew that when I left my home Saturday afternoon for what I considered a pretty standard hurricane evacuation, I’d never return.

“Going door to door, he distributed letters to advise the community that the neighbor formerly known as Phil — the husband, father and born-again Christian; the former Eagle Scout, Texas A & M University cadet and Army lieutenant — was going to start living full time as Phyllis.” The New York Times has a long and interesting profile of Phyllis Frye, the first transgender judge.

On Wednesday, journalist Alison Parker and cameraman Adam Ward were murdered on live television by a former co-worker. In the aftermath of Parker’s death, her father Andy Parker has publicly pushed for stricter gun control. In an interview with WDBJ7, the Virginia television station where Alison worked, Parker encouraged journalists to continue reporting on gun control and the gun lobby that prevents meaningful reform.

In reaction to one of its football players being convicted of sexually assaulting another student , Baylor announced it would investigate “the circumstances associated with this case.” Merely a week later, the university released results from the law professor-led investigation at 7 p.m. Central on a Friday—ensuring the least press coverage possible. So what were the results? That they are going to do another investigation.

Kim Davis, the Kentucky County Court clerk who has persistently refused to issue gay marriage licenses, has asked the Supreme Court to hear her case. Davis, an Apostolic Christian, has refused to issue the licenses for religious reasons, claiming that to do so would undermine her First Amendment freedoms.

As you might have heard, California is in a kind of permanent drought and counties across the state are trying to reduce their water usage. Yet celebrities seem deeply uninterested in environmental maintenance or following the laws of common people, and more interested in maintaining their lush lawns. Among those law breakers? Kylie Jenner and Tyga. The Hollywood Reporter tracked down the law-breakers through public records:

Sheriff’s Deputy Darren Goforth, 47, was fatally shot multiple times on Friday evening while filling up his patrol car at a gas station in suburban Houston, Texas. A manhunt for the suspect, who approached the uniformed Goforth from behind before shooting him, continued Saturday.

Here are the best of today’s deals. Get every great deal every day on Kinja Deals, follow us on Facebook and Twitter to never miss a deal, join us on Kinja Gear to read about great products, and on Kinja Co-Op to help us find the best.

Dearly beloved, we are gathered at this Pissing Contest today to share our stories of the strangest, funniest, and most fucked-up funerals that we’ve ever attended. (Thank you to Maxine Floeffler for the grim suggestion.) Please join me in bowing our heads for a moment of prayer and contemplation...of all the ways a funeral can go wrong.

In today’s Tweet Beat, Tyson Beckford has a bright future ahead of him, Mandy Moore remembers DJ AM and Matt McGorry stays on his feminist tip.

Good news, bad news: most Kindergarten-aged kids in America are still getting all their shots. But the CDC continues to worry about those stubborn pockets with low rates of vaccination (and, presumably, high rates of uncooperative parents).

That attractive graphic up there represents a plan put forth by a group of liberty lovers who’d like to see New York state split into two “autonomous regions”: New York, below, composed of the city plus Long Island and Westchester and Rockland Counties, and New Amsterdam, above, composed of everything else. If that sounds appealing to you, you can attend their rally on Sunday.

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There are so many kinds of jeans, that Dr. Seuss himself would have no trouble filling a book called New Jeans, Old Jeans, White Jeans, Blue Jeans. And on the page where he mentions “frayed-hem mayhem,” you’d find a photo of a furry Seussian character throwing a pair of blue jeans into a blender in a desperate attempt to be more fashionable than everyone else.

Earlier this month, after publishing a story about Sandra Bullock’s “super hot ” new boyfriend, a loyal reader emailed me. “Can give name and photo of Sandy B’s new bf,” their message said. My eyes widened. I felt like Bob Woodward getting a call from Deep Throat in 1972, only if Bob Woodward wrote for the Arts section and got a tip about Jane Fonda.