I can’t trust another woman again after love of my life cheated on me
DEAR DEIDRE: THE love of my life worked me like a dog, then cheated on me and left me for another man.
I feel completely broken and I don’t think I can ever trust a woman again.
I’m 35 and my ex is 30. We were together for six years.
Throughout our relationship, I supported her financially, working long hours to make sure she had everything she wanted.
I paid the mortgage, the bills, for meals out, gig tickets and holidays.
She occasionally chipped in, but she never paid her share.
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She works from home, running her own design business, which I helped her to establish, contributing thousands of pounds. I work in finance.
About a year ago, she went off sex. She made excuses and I didn’t want to pressurise her.
We still did it enough not to ring alarm bells. Then, last month, an afternoon meeting I had was cancelled, so I decided to go home and surprise her.
I thought I’d take her out for dinner somewhere special.
I walked in to find her sitting on the sofa with a strange man. They sprang apart and looked very shifty. My girlfriend said he was her accountant.
But this guy didn’t look like an accountant. He was young and wearing jeans and a T-shirt.
Over the next couple of weeks, I kept asking her about him.
Eventually, she broke down and admitted she’d been sleeping with him.
She said she wasn’t sure she loved me any more. I felt like someone had stabbed me through the heart.
I was so upset and angry I told her to leave. She packed all her things and went next day.
I heard she’d moved straight in with this man, which hurt even more.
I feel devastated, used and like I’ve been taken for a fool.
READ MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: Your ex behaved selfishly. Rather than tell you she wasn’t sure about her feelings, she cheated.
Perhaps there were signs things weren’t right – like her going off sex – but you either didn’t notice or chose to ignore them.
Maybe she felt the relationship was unequal, because you provided everything.
Your heart is broken but it will mend, I promise. You can love and trust again.
Be patient and allow yourself time to heal.
My support pack, Mend Your Broken Heart, will help.
Talking to someone is really important. Confide in a friend or relative about your feelings.
Counselling could also help you to move. See my support pack about this.