A Thousand Ways to Celebrate New Year’s Eve
I’ve spent years researching different ways of celebrating New Year’s Eve around the world. I guess I was looking for one that doesn’t include the typically Spanish colossal hangover on the 1st, after spending the whole night drinking, dancing (if you know how), and flirting (if you can). The truth is that none of them have quite convinced me, but I’m glad to know that there are millions of people across the planet who go completely crazy at 23:59 on Dec. 31, and 24 hours later return to their daily lives as if nothing had ever happened.
Russians usually write their wishes for the coming year on a sheet of paper, which they then burn to sprinkle the ashes over a glass full to the brim with champagne. According to my informants, some even drink the filthy liquid, although it is not specified how much vodka is needed beforehand to complete this part of the tradition. It’s not a bad idea. If you start the year drinking champagne with ashes, everything after that will have to be better. (READ MORE: Scary Baby New Year)
Filipinos dress up on the 31st in polka-dot dresses, which, due to their coin-like shape, symbolize wealth. They also rattle small change in their pockets to attract prosperity. I’m glad they don’t also believe that dollars grow on trees. Meanwhile, the Danes, at the end of New Year’s Eve dinner, throw the crockery they used for their meal on the floor; the more debris left on the floor, the better, because it means you have a lot of friends. I’ll do it at my mother’s house this New Year’s Eve and I’ll let you know how it goes — in six months when I’m allowed to leave the house again.
I’m fascinated by Puerto Rican New Year’s Eve, where people throw buckets of water out of the window to wash away the bad from the past year and leave the streets sparkling in the process. It’s a tradition that makes everyone very happy, except those who celebrate New Year’s Eve by going for a romantic stroll through the streets.
The Germans test their luck in another way: They melt lead and let a few drops fall into water, the way it solidifies reveals the luck that awaits them in the coming year. The anchor, for example, is good luck, and the cross is bad. I tried it and got a middle finger. I am looking for a German interpreter. (READ MORE: This Year, Read These Classic Conservative Books)
The Irish are more practical: The first one to cross the threshold of the house in the new year will be the one who brings luck to the household. I imagine they all pray that the first one to visit the family is not a tax inspector.
In places like La Plata, Argentina, they set dolls on fire to stage the year that is leaving, and fortunately, since Milei has arrived, it is the only thing that unionists are allowed to set fire to in the streets. While Chileans, on the other hand, hug strangers at the beginning of the year. As a Spaniard, I am not surprised, because after the 10th glass on New Year’s Eve, we hug lampposts, and sometimes we even ask them to marry us.
On Dec. 31, in Ecuador, it is a tradition for men to dress up as widows and ask for money from passing cars on the streets. They call it the “mad widow” and the old woman is supposed to have lost her mind over her husband’s upcoming departure, representing the year that is ending. It’s very elaborate, but I’m not sure it is sufficiently diverse and politically correct.
Once, the English did not traditionally celebrate New Year’s Eve after the excesses of Christmas. However, they are doing it more and more. They write resolutions over dinner, shout out the seconds of the countdown to the chimes, and then sing traditional songs, get drunk, and hug as if they will never see each other again. Just like any other soccer day. (READ MORE: The Anti-Woke Reading List)
In Peru, like in Spain, the tradition is to eat one grape for each chime (luckily there are 12, because in Japan they welcome the year with 108 chimes). In my case, the tradition of the 12 grapes covers my annual fruit ration. As for the myth that if you manage to eat them before the chimes end (a myth that has caused numerous fatal choking deaths) you will have good luck during the following year, I can confirm that it is just that, a damned myth. I’ve been choking on the fifth grape since I was a child and managing to stuff the 12 on time by inflating my cheeks like a damn hippopotamus and if you know anything about my good luck or have seen it anywhere, please do not hesitate to call me.
How will you celebrate? Happy 2024!
Translated by Joel Dalmau.
The post A Thousand Ways to Celebrate New Year’s Eve appeared first on The American Spectator | USA News and Politics.