Throwback! How U.S. Army spent $20,000 publishing rules for kids' game
Army Spc. Christian Flores applies face paint during the U.S. Army Europe European Best Warrior Competition at Hohenfels Training Area, Germany, July 29, 2020. Winners in the annual competition go on to represent U.S. Army Europe at the Army Best Warrior Competition. (U.S. Army photo by Spc. Austin Riel)
[Editor's note: This story originally was published by Real Clear Wire.]
By Adam Andrzejewski
Real Clear Wire
In 1983, the U.S. Army spent $20,000 — $61,650 in 2023 dollars — to prepare 30,000 fancy, multi-colored pamphlets explaining how to play the children’s’ playground game, King of the Hill.
For this wasteful spending, Sen. William Proxmire, a Democrat from Wisconsin, gave the Army a Golden Fleece Award in 1983. He gave awards to wasteful and nonsensical spending, eventually handing out 168 Golden Fleece Awards between 1975 and 1988.
“The Army has made a mountain out of a molehill but the poor taxpayer have taken the financial tumble,” Proxmire said then.
The pamphlet contained four pages of detailed rules, and a multi-colored diagram of an earthen mound to be used when playing the game. The Army said the purpose of the pamphlet was to “incorporate leadership, strategy planning, and decision-making skills into the physical fitness training program.”
Proxmire called that “nonsense … as the Russian army practices blitzkrieg tactics, massed infantry attacks, chemical warfare and subversion. Our playing King of the Hill will not keep Defense Minister Ustinov awake nights.”
(Photo by Blogging Guide on Unsplash)
He added, “King of the Hill has little resemblance to the modern battlefield, which is fluid, makes use of high technology weapons, including remote targeting and attack, and is not bound by detailed rules,” Proxmire said. “Whatever lessons about strategy which can be learned from King of the Hill will be useless on the battlefield.”
He also noted that children has been learning the rules of their playground game for years without any pamphlet.
“Drill instructors are notably proficient at keeping the troops fit,” he said. “If these instructors want to play King of the Hill to improve fitness, they do not need a Defense Department pamphlet filled with silly rules.”
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