My girlfriend and I are on fire but one person is threatening to destroy everything
DEAR DEIDRE: My new girlfriend has made me happier than I have felt in years – so I can’t handle the thought of anybody destroying what we have.
It’s got to the point where I don’t recognise myself.
We have only been together for five months but she has helped put me back together.
We have incredible sex, she makes me feel so wanted and we enjoy each other’s company.
So when my love rival, another man at work, openly flirts with her, it’s all I can do to hold myself back.
I’ve been fantasising about keying his car or sabotaging his work.
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Yesterday I really let myself down and barged past him, sending him flying, after I saw them laughing and joking in the canteen.
I’m a separated man of 38 and my ex-wife is 34. We have twins of seven. My wife and I went to school together but she’s never worked.
She wanted to be a mum but was miserable at home with the kids.
I’m a team leader in a call centre. I’d work different shifts, come home, clean up the house and put the kids to bed.
Everywhere was a mess while my wife sat on her phone, putting on weight and doing the minimum to keep the house going.
I think she was depressed but wouldn’t get help and used to take out her foul moods on me and the kids. It was awful and my self-esteem was rock bottom.
I met my lovely girlfriend when I spilled a coffee and she sprang to help me. She was so smiley and lovely that my heart skipped a beat.
We introduced ourselves, then started emailing each other. Within a month we were dating.
She’s 31 and single. I’ve never been happier.
I really think we have a good thing going but she’s friendly with everyone. What’s wrong with me?
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: This jealousy is being fuelled by low self-esteem.
You have met someone you really like and are petrified she will slip through your fingers.
But you have to get control of these destructive feelings. Your girlfriend has chosen you, so have some faith in her.
She is the gregarious sort so you will have to get used to that. Don’t allow your feelings of rage to take over because they will only push her away.
My packs on jealousy and managing anger shows where to find support.