I’m a teenager & told I look ‘perfect’ but don’t believe it – but I’m just one of many trapped in body confidence hell
WOMEN are caught up in a body confidence crisis.
Just 16 per cent of those aged 18 to 34 love their bodies, research has found, while 83 per cent have avoided events because of worries about their appearance.
The research, commissioned by wellness app Kic, also revealed just four per cent of ladies never worried about their looks.
Abigail Kerr, 19, is regularly told she looks “perfect” but still battles low self-esteem.
The scheduling engineer, who is single, blames social media.
She says: “I’m a size 8 to 10, but hate what I see in the mirror — I feel numb.
“I’m desperate to meet the standards on social media.
“I take hundreds of pictures to get the perfect image, but don’t feel confident.
“I only see my imperfections and don’t believe friends when they tell me I’m attractive.”
Abigail, from Sheffield, constantly compares herself to the “perfect” bodies of the Kardashians and other social media stars.
She says: “My friends also find that the snaps online cause body anxiety and stress.
“If you post a picture which is less than jaw-dropping, your likes and followers decrease and that hurts.
“I exercise, and have perfected my make-up technique, but even then I think I am a fraud.
“Pressure to be ‘social media beautiful’ is taking a toll on women my age, although we know having a healthy body is more important than it being picture perfect.
“I have a birthmark on the base of my stomach which I have always hated.
“It may seem small to others but it has affected my self-esteem.
“I feel uncomfortable in swimwear and will only be photographed in a way that the mark isn’t visible.
“I’m equally hard on other parts of my body. I hate that my nose is too big, so I’m saving up money to have surgery.
“And I don’t like the way my hips are shaped and the top of my thighs — they are too big for my body, out of proportion.
“But I am desperate to feel body confident and my goal is to be less critical of my features by the time I turn 21.”
US research found 88 per cent of women compare themselves to images on social media, with half of them finding the comparison unfavourable.
Millie Balodis, from Newcastle, was so affected by a TikTok trend, it left her questioning whether she should have surgery.
The 20-year-old psychology student, says: “Social media has 100 per cent made me more self-conscious about my body.
“Last year on TikTok people were taking videos with a side profile and it automatically drew an outline of your face.
“I realised how much I disliked the shape of my nose. I suddenly realised it looked much bigger than I’d thought before.
“It momentarily made me question whether I should get a nose job.
“I can understand why some people would go ahead and have surgery because of TikTok — even though it’s something I quickly realised wasn’t for me.
“My mum always says that when she was young, none of her friends obsessed this much.
“But it was different, as you weren’t scrutinised on a screen 24/7. Even when I get compliments, I just see my imperfections.
“At different points of my life, I’ve disliked various parts of my body. I’ve always thought my legs were not long enough, or thin enough.
“The people I follow on social media are models, and it does make me feel insecure.
“The Kardashians are the ones who set the standards, and I wish that I had a bum like Kim’s — mine seems non-existent.
“It doesn’t surprise me that so many women avoid events over confidence issues. It happens in my circle of friends.”
Millie is not alone in finding social media problematic.
A study by the American Society of Plastic Surgeons in 2021 revealed nearly half of patients said it played a role in them seeking plastic surgery.
Occupational therapy student Helena Bendall, 19, obsesses over parts of her body.
She says: “Although I’m a size 6 to 8, I think about my tummy constantly.
“It isn’t toned and I don’t have a six-pack like ‘normal’ people on social media.
“I’m always trying to cover it. When I went on a girls’ holiday to Venice recently, I wore a one-piece rather than bikini.
“This isn’t new for me — when I was younger and wore a bikini, I would cover it with a mesh dress.”
‘Voices within me’
Helena, of Edinburgh, admits body image concerns dominate her and her friends’ lives.
She says: “Perfect-looking influencers have changed the way we see ourselves. It’s impossible not to compare yourself.
“I was even approached by the organisers of Miss England, who asked me to enter after they saw my pictures on Instagram.
“I did, as they were so nice to me, and I got to the semi-final. It’s sad so many young women feel the way I do.”
Someone who has witnessed the body confidence crisis first-hand is mum-of-one Jade Hoyte, 26, from St Albans, Herts.
She runs her own cosmetic aesthetics salon and has seen a surge in younger women wanting treatments.
She says: “When girls in their early twenties come in for beauty tweaks I tell them it’s unnecessary.
“So many young women, myself included, are terribly self-critical. I’ve had Botox, fillers in my nose, cheeks, lips and jaw.
“I don’t like not having a sculpted and chiselled face structure and it’s a big insecurity.
“I used to see my side profile in photos and hated that my nose wasn’t completely straight and my face wasn’t symmetrical.
“Instagram is awash with women with perfect faces and bodies and I didn’t think I looked good enough.
“I am a naturally slim size 8, but my appearance still bothers me. I can’t help looking at influencers and nitpicking over parts of my body.
“Being told I am stunning doesn’t help, the voices within make me feel rubbish about my appearance.
“Wearing a bikini is a battle for me and shouldn’t be.
“My tummy is another one of my insecurities. After having a baby, I don’t feel it’s as toned as I’d want.
“I am hoping one day I will reach a place where I am happy with myself.
“I am seeing shafts of light, as there are more people on social media with messages about body positivity.
“I want to be accepting of this body that is strong and healthy.
“And I want my daughter, who is eight, to grow up in a world where she will exude confidence, as she does currently.”
Mental health and body image campaigner Natasha Devon MBE says: “While any gender can be affected by low body confidence, women are on the frontline of these issues.
“And it can have a huge impact on mental health.
“Therapy, or talking to friends and family, can help, but this is a social issue which means big business needs to take more action.
“Women are too important for lack of body confidence to ruin our lives.”